Kinna new to pheros. Been working on my inner confidence a few years so when I feel good I’m cool to be around.
I know sometimes you gotta match the pheros to who you are as a person. I’m also aware it’s not a date or sex in a bottle (If it was the whole world would know by now. ). However I feel that every lil bit helps.
Any way to go into the details and give you an idea so you guys can point at some stuff I should consider (and how much of it would be nice).
playing off of what I already said, I’m cute, charming to an extent, a lil bit of a cut-up, loyal, honest, smart (sometimes it seems to a fault) got a potty mouth and a natural loud voice. Naturally affectionate as well. I also tend to be on the gloomy side sometimes.
However it seems like I attract the ones I don’t want. I go for broke and as a result it seems to always be the ones that are hot and they probably know it. Most of the time, they generally are just NOT interested. I’m sure there is likely some sort of psychological explanation for that somewhere.
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Man before you do anything you should do the introduction for the $25 dollar gift certificate. What would prob help with your whole confidence thing would be instant shine or instant openness. Seeing as they are social pheros they will be able to help you relax and communicate better with the women. Oh and another thing that helps is if you read the stickys about what pheros to use etc. Another helpful thing is to read the body language article idk the link maybe another person does?
Yeah bad days I don’t have as much confidence as I should. So yeah from the stickies I read before I posted, I.S. sounds like it might be worth a try.
Q1: Not sure how to answer that. I’m not looking for it to be a cure all though cuz I’m pretty sure that in reality, it’s not.
Q2: Well outside of being capt obvious and saying “women” I’m looking for the hotties. As for what kind of hotties. It would likely be best to explore different kinds to figure that out.
As a side note, I also must add that I’m kinna muscular. Big arms and got the neck muscles where a strap can slide off my shoulder because my neck muscles are so built up (Think Bill Goldberg but not as “no-neck” as he is.)
This questions is more about what levels of attraction are you looking for. Respect, authority, wisdom, friends, talkative, intimidation, lust, etc. That kinda thing. Though, I think you pretty well covered that one.
I think you are right on track with the instant series. That’s where I started and now I’m hooked!
Actually neither. On a bad day it’s like an outer projection of feeling bad about myself.
On a good day. I just don’t care, I’ll try to get to know one without really giving it much thought.
But basically the problem is about myself and not really fear or intimidation. The whole “I have nothing to offer them” type of bs.
Generally I get friendzoned a lot or they act like they want to be friends but they figure they can vanish later.
I’m guessing I need a spark but not like one so crazy that they wanna get nasty right where I’m am. Something that makes it harder to friendzone me while I can be myself.
This needs more clarification. When you say you attract the ones you don’t want do you mean they’re simply not physically your type or is there some sort of personality characteristic about them that turns you off. What type exactly is responding to you and what about them makes them the ones “you don’t want”?
It’s nearly always physical. The type that have a rather undesirable body fat percentage. I don’t mind “curvy” but a few seem to be lying to themselves about what “curvy” really is. lol
I’m a guy, 25, single from the Volunteer State (the state of Tennessee, home of "Music City, USA [Nashville]).
I’m an entrepreneur. Looking to start a business. Looking to build my wealth from the ground floor up. As for how much, I really don’t know don’t care so long as my future kids have what they need and so will my future wifey and myself. If I can accomplish that I’m happy.
On good days I’m a fun guy. The kind of guy that if I knew I could get away with it I’d climb in a cockpit and pull the ejection seat handle just to know what it’s like to have a rocket go off underneath my ass and what it was like to be like a human missile. lol
Currently building my own Stoner (Eugene Stoner: engineer) design carbine.
Anyway, I’m your typical guy. I like sports, cars, video games, things that go bang and boom. I also like to play paintball in my spare time.
Takes time and practice, I also posted a similar topic on how to spot various types of hits from social, to respect hits to attraction hits etc. Best bet is to start practicing and learn to be aware of what’s going on. So many people are “self centered” they talk without noticing if anyone is listening, or are so focused on their own inner monologue they aren’t aware of the reactions to people around them. As trite and cliche as it might seem there was an episode of the “Pickup Artist” where Mystery had a couple of hotties model lingerie for the students and talk about their likes and dislikes. Then the students were quizzed about what the girls said. While unrealistic for everyday situations the theory behind it is sound. Some of the guys were so into drooling over the girls and most likely losing themselves in some sexual fantasy about them, that their words were most likely white noise that was being tuned out…bad.
Approach some women, with or without mones it doesn’t matter…you should be trying both anyway. Talk, ask questions, tell a joke or two, or a couple of stories that have dhv’s embedded in them. The real trick is to just be observant and pay attention. Make mental notes about things their doing body language wise, How talkative are they on a scale of one to ten…especially if one is more talkative than the other…just try and remember as much detail as you can about their behavior towards you. Then go back and compare their behavior to the IOI list or Hit descriptions. Do it a few times and eventually you’ll be able to spot them without trying.
Now, as far as attracting the wrong kind of women. What you put out, you tend to attract, Now I can’t make assumptions about the personalities or emotional states of the women you interact with because I’ve met some larger than average women that radiated confidence and dressed like they were out to break hearts (tastefully so, I’m not talking fat girl in skinny clothes) But if they’re dressing frumpy like the one in your picture, there may be a chance they have some confidence and self esteem issues.
Women that lack confidence don’t approach men or express interest very often, not unless the guy has communicated to them something that leads them to believe he feels as low value as they do.
It’s possible you’re doing or saying something that betrays a lack of confidence yourself. Try losing the gloominess, I went through a period of depression years ago and without understanding why at the time I became a magnet for people (not just women) with confidence issues, anger issues, self destructive tendencies etc. From very miserable mousy types that considered any attractive woman that looked like she put some effort into her health and appearance to be a slut, or dark gothy type chicks that assumed fun outgoing girls that like to have a good time are all fake and superficial. On some level you’re communicating something negative that convinces these women that you’ll accept them and join them in their misery (it does love company I’ve found)
Now, as a caveat I’m not suggesting that everyone that’s large or typically unattractive by today’s media standards has some emotional issues, but I have found that more often than not, how we present ourselves on the outside tells a lot about how we feel about ourselves on the inside and a person that slumps, frowns and walks around in whatever baggy clothes happen to be clean at the moment is somebody that doesn’t think highly enough of themselves to present themselves to the world as the awesome person they should believe they are.
Taking that into consideration, what are you doing that might be communicating that you may be a kindred spirit to these women? (rhetorical question…just contemplate)
Can you tell me what you are looking for from the mones? Is just plain attraction of the opposite sex , and what is your personality like, are you shy or outgoing?
You really described yourself alot, but you missed this 2 key points very important.
I used to word that differently. “You unknowingly project all that you are” scenario.
Basically I think I have failed to project my self worth. Looking back it seems that I may have said or projected some things that would naturally lower my self worth in their eyes.
I am fortunate in one aspect. My aunt, despite the fact that she’s like 50 something, is still perceived by many as a knockout. She’s always been real good at trying to find stuff for me to wear and what not that has more psychological appeal toward my type. I do get women that seem like they might be interested that are quite attractive but it only seems to happen when I am dressed to knock’em out (And consequently in a good mode which would be why I’d be dressed that way.)
One of my favorite pro football players strikes again I guess. Deon Sanders always said “You dress good, you look good, you look good you feel good, you feel good, you play good, you play good, they pay good.” And he married a supermodel so I can’t really argue. lol
You mention in your description that you’re a bit of a cut up, analyze your style of humor.
Do you use a lot of self deprecating humor? Done right it actually shows confidence but too often it betrays hidden issues that we use humor to cope with.
Is your humor critical of the types of people/lifestyle that would endear it to people that might be “haters” IE Joke about the rich and the poor will love you for it…get my meaning?
Mine seems to most often attack those that seem to lack common sense. I do attack myself but only when I intend to not make an issue out of it. I also use sarcasm but I use it most when I’m annoyed. I also use an “act out method” where I mimic people doing things and purposefully exaggerate it for the sake of humor.
I think I learned that stuff from my older sister. lol
by any chance does your sister remind you of the cartoon character Daria? Not trying to be insulting, it’s a serious question. I’ve observed that people with a negative yet “superior” attitude behind their humor tend to attract low self esteem people like a pied piper.
). However I feel that every lil bit helps.
