Uh, you seem to be treating me like a newbie! I realize that you were only trying to help, but let me assure you that I know the rules and I know the game. That doesn’t change the fact that it’s rude. If I hosted a party where a girl that blew off my phone calls showed up at, would I not tell people that she blew me off? Please explain the difference.
As to social status, the last girl that I dated was the daughter of one of, if not the richest men in Brasil and hung out with ex-presidents, playboys, social butterfly’s, traveled anywhere the hell she wanted to on her private jet, is an actress who is right now shooting her first movie, and I think left me for one of the top soccer players in the world.
But you know what? She was one of the most respectful girls I’d ever met, made it clear that she liked me for me, and made me feel more loved than anyone I had ever met before, for a little while anyway!
M I D, that sucks, but people tha. Change their mi d and don’t tell you can happen in many ways. Overall, whatever the reasons are, it might be easier to avoid explaining than actually explaining.
As for calling, if you are funny ( or can be ) use that. It has always served me well.
My favorite: answering your phone sounding like your greeting, but saying funny stuff. I’m fast on my feet and I do this with everyone. It can be damn funny.
And for anyone that hasn’t followed my journal, here’s a few pics of her. She was easily the most incredible girl I ever dated, and made me feel more loved and more special than I’d ever felt.
I don’t really follow journals Mark, but I have seen that picture of you and her as your avatar, and from what I gather now it must suck. You know, finding someone who is actually genuine, nice, and honest. Someone that gives you hope that things between you and her may just work out, but then things like this happen (and sometimes without warning) and it’s devastating. So I’m sorry Mark, but from what I’ve noticed on the boards you seem like a great guy who is all about being just that, a great genuine great guy so I am deeply sorry. However, I’m sure there’s someone who is/will be just right for you. Its just looking that sucks.
No, it really doesn’t. It still hurts, because in all honesty I really don’t know for sure what happened, I just know it wasn’t the same as it was before.
We have messaged back and forth and she says she want’s things to be like they were before, but I really don’t know what that means. I told her that I could be her friend, but that was all it could ever be now, so I guess we’ll see.
But, I told her I wanted to leave everything as it’s been and not talk, message or chat until next month, because we really hadn’t done much of it this month anyway. We’ll see!
it happens to me all the time, and I just move on to the next
I also do the same thing, sometimes i give out my number and then regret it, like I did with that french girl and she would not stop harassing me, she finally stopped calling after she got the hint I was not interested.
Well, Mark good luck with whatever may happen. If she is thinking of having another possible relationship with you, I just hope that she will know what she wants. Wouldn’t want you to go through that again. It’s good that you’re doing good though in regards to the situation.
Can’t happen, that part of my heart has been sealed off and my barriers put back up. That’s part of the reason for me not wanting to talk for the rest of the month. I will be a friend to her, a best friend if we can get back to that poiint, and I will be there to lift her spirits anytime she is feeling down, but I won’t go back to thinking that there could be anything more between us, at least not without a lot of kicking and screaming!
That’s good, and I don’t blame you. I think being more aware and cautious of having your feelings hurt is the only way to learn from incidents like this, because if it weren’t that way we’d all continue going back just to possibly get hurt. Unless they manage to honestly show you different, in a way though I think we all still have a barrier “just in case.” At least I do, only because you never know. It’s hidden pretty good though.
Yep, I’ve had a huge barrier. “S” got through it, but not completely and not right away. Daniela tore down every wall and barrier I had and burrowed herself deep into my heart in a matter of days! Nobody else has EVER done that!
I’ve rebuilt and fortified those barriers now though, and it would pretty well take an act of God to knock them down again. She has my friendship and my support anytime she’s feeling down again, but I don’t think I have anything else to give. I already gave her my all and got hurt, twice! I’m just not that masochistic to try again.
Relationships come and go, but friends are forever! We did build a great friendship, even though we’re 5,000 miles apart. And that’s worth trying to salvage.
Lol, I just love how the women just simply overrate themselves.
Because nowadays men are forced to be ‘fake’ to approach a woman. If you dont wanna second guess then why dont you be the one approaching the guy whom you think is ‘genuine’ instead? No offense but women demand too much. Women just wanna wait sitting pretty without making much effort and want us to be brave enough to approach them and interest them. Then, if they like us they want us to be ‘genuine’ and focus all attention to her only from then on, but if they dont like us they will just say ‘bye, Im not interested’ and throw us into the garbage can.
So if ‘big-headed’ women can be selfish in ‘filtering’ guys as they please, why cant guys with ‘game’ do the same? I mean if I have what it takes to approach you and interest you, why should I just stop at you? Unless you have something more than your looks, Im going to try to approach and interest other women as well because beauty is very common. Im not hating or anything. Im just saying that both men and women have their own selfishness. Its not fair to just point at one side as the ‘bad guy’ without looking through that side’s point of view.
As DJandarial said in another post, “Its the same game with different rules”.
You are a woman. You dont understand because you are not expected to make the first move. As I said all you have to do is sit there and wait for the bees to come up to you and entertain you then you can simply take the best and brush off the rest.
It is very not easy for a guy to approach someone he is attracted to. Not only he has to control himself, he also has to think hard to impress the woman and compete with other guys. So by dehumanizing the target, it takes away a lot of pressure. Im not saying it is okay, Im just saying its understandable.
EXACTLY HOLMES! Its a fact the sincere nice guys dont even finish!
Jankren, This is not what this thread was about! And for the record, I agree with her! If we’re gonna wait more than 3 days to call, then what the f right do we have to expect them to be waiting around for the call?
I see eye to eye with you on all of this Mark, but at least just like you mentioned you still have her friendship. Sometimes that’s better than having nothing at all, especially if that person meant a lot to you. So I wish you the best.
Who cares if they don’t reply to you the next day? there are so many factors. I even have a friend who hardly ever replies to my texts, she even text me recently saying we should meet up again sometime and yet she never replied back to me! lol..
If i ever get a girls number in a club etc, I will always text them to tell me when their home safe! If they’ve moved away to another club I would still text them. If they’re interested in some form or anotherThey’ll definiatly reply - So suggest she comes to where you are, if she can’t she’ll hopefully suggest you coming to her, which is a good sign IMO. It doesn’t matter if you can’t go to her, what matters is if she comes to you or invites you It’s all about wanting, not so much about being able to.
The next day I’d ask how their night was. They’ll happily reply to it even if they are not interested in you, the only ones which might ignore it are the ones who have boyfriends etc.. already ans so you should not really be complaining.
I dont see the point in even bothering to try and call them in this day and age. Sure, before mobiles you would have to call them, but since we have a very relaxed way of communication (texting) callign someone you met for possibly only 5 minutes is almost like saying “I’m extreamly desperate so I thought I’d use a very upfront method to put you on the spot and hopfully force you onto a date”.
Just text them and then call them, to arrange things the times etc.. I hardly call my friends unless it’s to arrange something, like times to go out etc.. where texting would just take too long, I can always see my friends texting rather than making calls /reciving them, why be any differernt to a chick you met the night before?
Well thats my thought on the matter. I’ve only had one girl that didnt really respond to me and that was cause’ she had a boyfriend, and she did reply to say she cant talk to me lol so meh lol. I know texting is probabily more so for younger people like me (21) so i can understand someone in their 40s? calling instead, I’d still avoid leaving a message like “hi im xyz from last night call me back on ##” - I’d rather say “heya its xyz calling, just making sure you got home ok last night, hope you had a good night” …
It’s all about wanting, not so much about being able to.