Wen Out With my Ex

Field Reports & Anecdotal Experience Men's Pheromone Advice & Field Reports
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And it went pretty good, until towards the end…

She came to pick me up, and when I got into the car, she gave me that “Deer in Headlights” look, which was a great plus…

We went shopping for a dress and went to a number of stores, through out the day she gave me a few seductive looks or those “checking me out” stares. I realized its really hard to catch these from her because shes so quick to turn away.

Andway when we got to the 2nd dress shop, she started calling me “hun, honey and babe” which she hasnt done in a WHILE… so that was great.

Now, the day started sucking when I pretty much looked in her cell phone text messages, which i KNOW i set myself up for a break down. So yea, asshole me did that, and I read something I really wish I didnt, turns out she has feelings for some other guy, but this guy doesnt have feelings for her =/… but yea, i felt like an asshole and i got depressed at the same time.

Anyway, I think I gave her the vibe I wanted, and we are hanging out real soon once again, looking to increase that vibe and hopefully get her thinking twice about me.

And the 3rd time we hang out Im gonna make my move =(…

Just incredibly depressed from what I read in her phone, i feel like a jerk for doing that I KNEW i was in for a emotional pounding. But I just had to know what was going on..

I really hope this turns to my favor, god I just wanna die…

anyway, pheromones really did well, hope it keeps it up..

oh and here is my set up

Ammo - 2 sprays
Instant Shine - 3 sprays
Instant Openness - 3 sprays
Turn Up The Heat - 1 spray

2

Ah, dunno but I’ve dated lots of women with more than one BF. Some of them were married! And I was doing exactly the same thing. The old Christian-Judeo idea of monogamous and exclusive couples is great on paper but rare in reality, especially in teens and 20s when you’re exploring and figuring life out. I make it a point of not digging through my GF’s email and text messages. It’s better not to know the gritty details. I had a GF that was having phone sex (!) with half the guys in town…

As for the DIHLs, I bet you were wearing was probably a hoe lotta androstenol.

3

Look at it this way. She isn’t cheating on you, because she is (currently at least) your ex. Just because she is attracted to another guy does not mean she cannot be still attracted to you. Many people I know, who are happily married and have no intention of cheating on their spouse still get attracted to others - they just don’t do anything about it. Yes, they still feel attracted to others, after all they are married - not dead. They look and wonder, but they don’t touch.

In your case, it’s even less of a problem if she likes someone else - at the moment not only is she your ex (currently) but the guy doesn’t feel the same way as she does - so he is not likely to be getting in your way.

Try not to let this bother you too much, and unless she tells you about it, never mention it to her - even if you get back together. Because, you will have to tell her how you know and having to admit you went through her phone will set off major alarm bells for her and will backfire spectacularly on you.:open_mouth:

It’s perfectly possible to feel attracted to more than one person at the same time for both men and women.:slight_smile:

Best
May

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It’s bad that you got depressed like that :frowning:, but you still have a hell of a chance by the look of it. Keep it up and I hope you get lucky :smiley:.

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May, your advice is a bit off.

She is an ex for a reason. See, in relationships there is no grey area. Women either like you or they don’t. If his ex still found him attractive and liked him they wouldnt have broke up period. When women dig you they dont want anyone else, ever. Its so simple. Not to mention why bother with someone when you know for a fact her heart lies else where? I dont know about you, but I dont settle for sloppy seconds. I deal with absolutes, not half baked bs excuses. Plus, if they got back together all the things that turned her off will still be there. And May its a huge problem if she likes someone else at this time. Hes trying to get her back and she likes someone else. See a problem with that? Kinda like knocking at someones door when you know there not home.

Bryan, listen to me. I may sound harsh at times, but everything I’m telling you is the absolute truth.

Why are you trying to get her comfortable with you? You guys were together at one time so she should already be comfortable. She may like this one guy, but you have no idea how many other turkeys shes string along.

Her calling you honey, hun, babe means absolutely nothing. Its all talk. Some women deserve academy awards for there great acting skills. Ask yourself this Bryan did she touch you all? Kiss you? Put her arm around you? Hold your hand? Compliment you? Talk about getting back together? Ask you out for another time? Girls with high interest level do these things. You may think its the mans job to do these things to a woman. I say bs. If you play your cards right women will come on heavy and do those things I mentioned.

Bryan, the only way your going to quit getting your heart smashed by this girls tricks is by standing up for yourself and be the man you need to be. Stop being her shoulder to cry on and dont be her personal stooge. Your not here for that and it wont get you any points with her either.

If your dead set on still persuing her then do this. Now is the time to pin her down about this relationship. No not physically. Be a stand up guy and next time you see her look her in the eyes and ask her point blank if your ever getting back together. Anything other than yes means no. If by chance she says yes say when, because you have other women who are dieing to go out with you, even if you dont. Dont let her weasel out of this Bryan with excuses. And do not apologize for any of this. If she says no, then look how many other women you get to have fun with.

My Dad once told me Son, your going to experience alot of rejection in all aspects of life, but it will define who you are by how you handle it. You can sit around and continue to let this girl use your heart as a toy or you can stand up and do something about it and chalk it up as a learning experience, so you will know the next time around. Good luck.

6

Eh, I dunno May… she pretty much told him that she cant begin to say how strong her feelings are for him, and that she can see her being with him forever… The thing is, this guy is her ex from like 2 years ago, who cheated on her, broke up with her, and stopped talking to her for over a year =/… makes me feel so special huh

i dont know… i just lost everything after reading that. And when I was driving home with her, i had this blank look on my face which is my way of being deep in thought which is usually a depression sign, and she asked me atleast 4-5 times in the car what was wrong, I blamed it on me being tired and trying to concentrate, but I think she noticed something…

I have to stop thinking about that, and I have to step my game up, my current game isnt cutting it. Could use som suggestions? maybe if anyone has that book The Mystery Method, can you give me some ideas/suggestions from their?

Remember, this is my ex, who doesnt want a relationship right now, I just want to get her thinking about me the way shes thinking about that other ex of hers…

let the depressive night begin =/

Bryan

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I’ve only read a bit of the Mystery book I’m still reading through it but one of the things I think is valuable is where it tells you not to think of the other person as “the prize” that YOU have to compete for. But to think of yourself as the “prize” THEY would be very lucky to win.

This isn’t to say you have to be extremely arrogant and rude, because that is crass and a turn off but there is nothing as sexy as confidence, in fact it doesn’t even have to be confidence you feel down to the bone, just an appearance of confidence will do the trick. To put it simply, when you believe in and value yourself - then others will think more highly of you and place a premium on your company.

From what you have said about this guy it sounds to me like your lady would be very lucky to have you and it sounds like you know that too! So, don’t put a low value on yourself, you have a lot to offer! :slight_smile:

Remember that every time you look in the mirror and believe it. If you believe it, you will act that way, and it is more likely that she will come to believe it too!

Hugs :slight_smile:

May

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Not only possible but perfectly natural and healthy. The problem is knowing where to draw the line before you lose it all…

9

May, your absolutely right. Just wish it was easier.

But then again, who ever said love was easy?

Next time we hang out, which should be Saturday or Sunday, I need to take to slightly to the next level, more flirting on my part, and more touching… Today, we got somewhat flirty in the car, me tickling her and her intentionally knocking my elbow off the arm rest lol. When we went to McDonalds, i rested my chin on her shoulder, and rubbed her arms… Just trying to bring the physical closeness back, the great news is she didnt resist at all when I did this, which is very good because we havent been physically close like this for a month.

Im hoping to get my new batch of pheromones in, my main ones, MX105 and Instant Female Magic should help me out extremely. Also getting Instant Honesty 2x strength which should help.

Anyway, she has a tendancy to turn away from things when she cant have them, like she cant have her other ex boyfriend, so im hoping she will try and turn away from him, the guy who doesnt deserve a girl like her, and snap back to me =/

Sounds like a romantic movie huh… bleh, doesnt mesh well with realiity.

Bryan

10

More wisdom from May.

Not me.

Alternatively, you could phero up, take her out and show her a great time, but not initiate any advances at all. Let her think a little about her interests, and the fact that you’re not hitting on her. You could respond to things she initiates, keep things at a low level. If you find her pulling you too deep, you could say something along the lines of “It feels like you’re not quite ready for this now,” or “It feels like you have some unresolved choices to make first.”

Then after you leave don’t initiate any more contact with her for a few days. Give her something to think about.

It’s a different alternative to the approach you’re thinking of. Perhaps it has some advantages if you’re playing for keeps.

11

Ok… now im about to break down riight now, and i know this isnt the place… but kristin (my target, ex gf) her grandfather just died… and she text me, so i called her. And she pretty much confessed to me about those text messages that i read, and adding to that she told me that they had kissed the other day when they hung out. =/

But she also said how he used to be “sweet” back when he dated her, and now hes a drunk/asshole kinda to her. like a week ago, he told her how much he loved her and how bad he wanted to be with her, and now she found out he was “going out” with this other girl, but apparantly according to him, he just likes her but she doesnt like him and shes really broken up about it.

I seriously started tearing, not in the selfiish way that she kissed him and whatever, but i was tearing because she deserves so much better then this guy.

I think i know what I have to do now… god… i hate the fact that she kissed this guy.

im sorry, i know this isnt the place to say something like this, im just so broken up about all this, and all my friends say is to forget about her, but thats just it, i dont want to, shes 1 in a million to me.

12

The Mystery Method and a lot of the PUA methodologies wouldn’t necessarily apply well to your current situation, as they are geared more towards success with the initial pick up and the progressions immediately (relatively speaking) after. They are not intended to help you win back a girlfriend. The Mystery Method in particular is a presented in a very methodical way… outlining the process of gaming a woman from the initial pick up in a very linear, almost text-book fashion. It leaves very little room for interpretation and adaptation to your situation and personality, and as such, there’s quite a lot I disagree with in that book (as any free-thinking person should when they read something)

I do think there is some value to looking into these books and articles in your case though…not necessarily to read up on the little methods, tricks, and processes, but more to allow you learn to think and feel like a person who feels confident and successful with women. I would argue that working on how you think, feel and believe (your inner game as some would call it) is vastly more important than working on what you actually do and say. How you feel about yourself, how you think about different situations, and what you believe your role in all of it is will reflect in how you carry yourself and how you talk. In turn this will affect how people perceive you and how they feel about you. If you feel negatively (ie depressed), then this will reflect in how you carry yourself, and in turn will reflect in how people perceive you. If you think positively, and feel genuinely confident and attractive, this will reflect upon yourself and everyone around you. Its infectious, and guess what? this is what women are primarily attracted to…so much more than what you actually do or say…so much more than pheromones can do on their own.

All of that being said, I’ve followed your post and this whole situation with your gf for the past week or so, and your writings here have been rife with negativity (sorry if thats offensive). You feel depressed when she blows you off, or you find out she’s attracted to another guy, etc etc. That sort of mentality…resorting to those types of feelings and thoughts when things don’t go your way… will be the true downfall of this situation IMO.

Women aren’t attracted to emotional, negative, depressed types of stimuli (and by no means am I implying that you personify these types of characteristics). Contrarily women are attracted to positive, confident, and enjoyable personalities. Things rarely ever go as planned with women…even when things go well. Plans go bust, she may be attracted to someone else etc etc. If you find you can’t handle these types of situations well (in a positive fashion), either learn how to handle them, or move on.

13

AskMen.com - Ex girlfriend

What should a guy do if he wants to get back together with an ex-girlfriend?
If your significant other breaks up with you, two of the best things you can do to get her back are: 1- Act like you’re okay with her decision to leave.
2- Start dating other people and let her know about it.

How to Get Your Ex Back | eHow.com
Trying to get your ex back requires a leap of faith because you know the relationship already failed at least once. Both of you have every reason to believe the second (or third or fourth) time around will end the same way. The necessary changes require honesty, forgiveness and hard work.
Step One

Ask yourself why you want to get back together. Soberly, carefully assess why you want to make another effort.
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Step Two

Take a self-inventory. What did you do wrong in round one?

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Step Three

Demonstrate that the problems you experienced the first time around are not going happen again. Show how you have changed.

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Step Four

Romance your ex all over again. Remind him or her why you two fell in love in the first place.

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Step Five

Let the past be the past. All the old wounds and arguments are from another epoch, as far as you are concerned.

Read this
5 Ways to Get Your Ex Back
Be Strong****Minimize Contact
Be Flexible
Get Out
Be Yourself

or maybe this will work…
Win Back Love
Secret System To Get Your Ex Back in 21 Days Or Less. Win Back Love.:smiley: