EPIC WTF - The object of my affection tells other women that I'm GAY

[Ftordces]

@thegentleman

I had one more issue with country girl last night. We were at a country bar and sat down to listen to a band. Well next to her is a couple of guys in their late 40’s early 50’s and they notice her…hell what’s not to notice?
Anyway, guy immediately to her left starts to chat her up. Sees me and introduces himself, I’m sitting back chilling listening to music. He then asks her if she’s married. I know what’s up, he’s checking her status in a “non-chalant” way.

She of course says no, but is clearly using body language to let him know she’s not interested. Doing the ol’…“yeah…but anyway” turn away and start talking to me kind of stuff.

This goes on and off for a bit, he then asks her to dance. I don’t mind, she dances with a lot of older guys when we go out, in general they’re usually really skilled country dancers and she won’t dance with anyone who doesn’t possess those skills.

She’s polite and accepts and they dance on the floor right in front of where we’re sitting. As they start to sit down the guy starts to run kino on her. I know what’s up, she’s astute been in and out of clubs many years, but I know she doesn’t know about kino, and I get a confirmation later that this guy does. (He starts telling us about how his friend ‘games’ women and is so skilled that he never walks out alone. This is the other guy sitting to his left.)

So I’m keeping a watchful eye and she runs off to the bathroom. I already knew once she announced this, drunk cowboy was gonna make his move cuz that area of the bar was really off the beaten path and the hallway gave way for a lot of privacy. I already planned on making my way over there if she didn’t come back in a respectable amount of time.

He’s drunk so he starts to make his move, gets distracted and she’s on her way back when he actually finally makes his way over there. He goes in for a hug to say “thanks for the dance,” and out of the corner of my eye I see her take a step back and he notices her defenses are up and stops in his tracks.

So I excuse myself and walk to the bathroom. I then explained to the gentleman that he could dance with her as much as she wanted to dance, but just be respectful. He starts to ask how he’s being disrespectful. I told him he wasn’t, but just don’t cross any lines.

As the night progresses and he gets drunker, he of course then tells Country Girl I “threatened” him in the bathroom. I said,“no, I told you you could dance with her all you wanted, just be respectful.”

She then says, “You two have this conversation without me” and runs off to the bathroom.

She came back, I didn’t explain myself. I figured it would only make my case look worse. Drunk Cowboy continued to ask her to dance until she finally stopped him in the middle of their dance and he asked why and she said, “because you keep fucking it up.”

But to get back to the point of dating hot women and the kind of shit you have to put up with. I got asked at least 3 times in two hours if we were together.
Never have I noticed a couple in a bar and asked them their status fi they were together talking, drinking and having fun.

Even at one point the band’s singer as he’s leaving just walks over and says, “It was nice meeting you.” They never met. LOL
As he’s walking away I say, “Oh yeah, nice to meet you too.” She busts out laughing and he says, “Oh are you two together.”
I mean come on, we’re the only two at that end of the bar where her stool and legs are situated between mine.
So I say to him, “dude I know, its kind of hard to see past her.” She starts busting out again and he just kind of sheepishly walks off.

We chatted about the whole, “are you two together?” questions we always get. Apparently she’s used to that with the guys she dates. I’ve never experienced it…so whatever.

First Gent it seems that you went away for a while, if so welcome back, second I think Gotchatz felt the threat became about you after this response where you explained in detail your issues with Country Girl.

@Gotchaz

There’s your problem right there, from the way you talk you come across as if she was your hot wife or something. I personally don’t understand what this means “if we are out together then we stay together?” is this something you made up in your head?

I hope you’re at least getting laid for the headache she’s giving ya. I would ask if she wants to be exclusive and if not move on, don’t be a puppet and let her string you along.

and yes she is easy pickings since you’re NOT together.

Then Gotchatz went excited and a bit overly “alpha” which made him confuse which girl you were talking about. Gent I’ve read many of your post and know your writing style and I was able to see your advice to the OP embedded in your response (newer members may not understand that some times you give advice by sharing your experiences) also, being older makes me understand that more traditional people live by and die by this “if we are out together then we stay together” even if it is a non-exclusive couple, that is (or at least just to be) a combination of courtesy, respect, loyalty and good communication that DO NOT EXIST in today’s society. Finally Got (and we all for that matter) I think these statements are out of place and context, “don’t be a puppet and let her string you along.
and yes she is easy pickings since you’re NOT together” because only The Gentleman knows the real situation and besides they were made out of a confusion (2 different Ladies and situations).

I’m not trying to mediate or defend anyone, I was just typing out loud, LOL

[tisha23]

@texaspete

It’s a new situation for me. I’ve dated beautiful women before, but she’s in a whole other league. I’m being as deliberate about everything as I can, though, trying not to lose my head/temper around these guys. Any advice/ experiences /stories about dating younger/hotter women would be much appreciated.

Oh cool man is she from another planet ?

Or maybe she is really a man

I hate to break this to you but there are 4 leagues The male female gay and BI leagues. Your in the male league and she is in the female league so technically she is out of your league but thats what your shooting for or you would be in the gay league and we already established you dont want to play with that league.

(((Pete))) I am just teasing you. She go’s into the league you put her in so she cant be out of your league unless you believe it to be true. That’s your own fears speaking. She picked you so obviously she doesn’t feel that way. Your not out of her league man.

@Pete

I have serious issues with the way other men react to her.

That’s just insecurity because you keep thinking she is out of your league.

I agree with most of RAD’s post # 41 except the last part.

Act all jealous and not only do you come across as weak but you visibly and mentally put her out of your league.

Do absolutely nothing and people think your weak and your women wears the pants in the relationship.

My husband and I have been together for over 20 years. He has always been alpha in personality. I am as well. But in a relationship one person takes that position. The other steps back into what some call the Low Alpha or the beta position. The relationship cant work any other way. I could write a book on the dynamic but I will save that for another time LOL

I get hit on in front of my husband sometimes. Men will look. He doesn’t get jealous though because that would show weakness and he is a lot of things but weak is not one of them. He will show what I can only term as supremacy. Not in a violent way or a controlling way but in a masculine protect whats mine way. He uses body language and kino to do this. A hand at the small of my back, a arm around my shoulders. Standing close and turning his body sort of towards mine.

Here look at Matthew>>>>

http://lifestylesfashion.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/03/Matthew-McConaughey-and-Camila-Alves-celebrity-fashion-trends-150x150.jpg

What is his body language and facial expressions saying ?

He looks relaxed , body slightly pointed toward her, arm around her waist. He is saying “yes she is hot and she is mine”

Even the bieber has it down

http://lifestylesfashion.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/03/Justin-Bieber-and-Selena-Gomez-Oscars-Awards-2011-150x150.jpg

Now suppose your out mingling at a party or social event and you see some guy making a move or just being overly attentive.

I dont agree you should call her over so she “chooses”. You can walk over and just integrate yourself into the convo and use body language and kino to display confidence and supremacy.

Its important that you go to her and not call her to you because the person your signaling is not her its the guy hitting on her.

Your signaling that…

1. I am not threatened.

2. The body language you use when you get there will show that your saying “mine”. If the relationship is good she will naturally respond with her own body language. Sort of lean into you, tilt towards you, put her hand on your arm. That is her signaling choice.

3. Your showing both her and the guy that even though her attention is elsewhere your confident in your standing in the relationship.

When you call her away even in a casual manner you are saying to both her and to the guy pursing her. I am afraid she will choose you so I will make her choose me. You walking over in a friendly confident manner and using body language and kino is leading. If she picks up on you calling her over to run interference she will see it as weakness just as quickly as she see’s jealousy that way.

Now there are times when I will be out at a party with my husband and some guy is showing IOI but he is not showing signs of trying to pick me up or being inappropriate. I will glance up and see my husband across the room and he will make direct eye contact. He will not be glaring at me or anything he just holds that eye contact, glances sort of up and down my body then winks and grins. This is his signal for me not the smitten guy. Its says I trust you and we both know who your going home with. You dont always need to walk over and intervene.

Works the same way for women to.

Sometimes I will see a women getting overly interested in my husband. I will walk over, say Hi and introduce myself, put my hand on his arm, and look her straight in the eye with a smile. I am saying “mine” and my direct eye contact with her is saying I am not threatened. If she still pursues then I will use other body language to convey “bring it on bitch” all while smiling and being perfectly friendly. There is a whole conversation going on with our pheromones, body language and kino under the obvious verbal conversation. Its not confrontational at all. Its how we interact. Its how we communicate just like with pheromones. We are not always conscious of it but when you are you are in control of your environment and your interactions.

Tisha

[bhillboy37]

Don’t know if you’ve already solved the problem but here is my two cents. Call her up one weekday and say something rude but real like “Hey, you ought to come over and let me smash that.” Not how about we make love tonight. Just say some rude shit. Not overly vulgar like “fuck” or anything. Just be real like “I been wanting to hit that since we meet. You should stop by the store and get some liquor/wine and let me tap that.” Basically fuck her or “FUCK HER!” Why not be rude to her. She’s being rude to you. Telling people you’re a dork or your’re gay. The way I feel about these situations that happen to men when we think more of a woman than we think about ourselves is we need to just reverse it all the way. If she comes over beat that pussy to death and send her on her way. I wouldn’t even let her stay the night. I like to say " I like to sleep alone" or “I have to get up early and you’d be more comfortable at your own house.” If she comes over its all good if not, stop talking to this soul killing bitch because trust me she’s killing you slowly and you’re allowing her too. Hell, you’re encouraging her to by taking her out and shit. Basically you got to either Fuck Her or say “FUCK HER!” and get with some chicks that want to do what you want them to do.

[ochrismongrelo]

@mobocaster

Well, every time I’ve come across the “oh - he’s gay” scenario has involved a woman justifying why they are dating/having good times with a man but not getting into a relationship/sleeping with them and all of them have been quite nuts or actively leading him on.

The more normal ones tend to go for “he’s my best/special/closest male friend,” whilst sending out a public vibe that looks as close to being a couple as she can manage.

But yes, the OP needs to create tension (don’t explain anything) & take this into more sexual territory as soon as possible. If only to find out where he stands once and for all.

Hmm. Last time a chick told another chick at work that I was gay, I went up to them both and told the new girl to ‘Excuse her, she likes to try to pee on my leg and mark her territory in weird ways…’ and introduced myself to the new girl - - - firmly negging the first chick and dhv’ing with the second one at the same time. Turned out the first chick was actually crazy about me. xD

[ochrismongrelo]

@tisha23

Girls wont tell other girls your gay because they are attracted to you LOL

Tisha

For once I have to disagree with ya, Tisha… I’ve had a girl do that to ‘mark territory’ per se ; trying to throw me off the radar of a new girl at work who had shown interest in me. rofl.

[mobocaster]

Yeah - calling them out on it in a firm but not unpleasant way is the best way here.

I’ve only had it happen to me a couple of times over the years but I’ve seen it happen quite a lot more. Don’t put up with it and IME, they come running back!

The guys who put-up with it and went along with the “joke” tended to get put throught the emotional wringer by them in all sorts of other ways.

[ochrismongrelo]

@Gotchaz

One thing you can try is touch your thumb and index fingers together close your eyes and think of something funny or something that makes you happy for a few minutes. Do this afew times everyday for a couple weeks, I know it sounds stupid..I use to do this for public speaking vause I would get nervous, after awhile you’ll find everytime you touch your thumb and index finger together you automatically feel good. I know sounds weird but hey…our brains are funny things

In business psychology that’s called ‘Anchoring’, and it’s massively powerful

[ochrismongrelo]

@Godhand

Also, you need to stop acting so beta. You mention that you do wrestling and MMA. Maybe you need to get under the iron a little more and go up a weight class. The extra testosterone would be worth its weight in gold. Every scenario that you describe involves you taking the beta route. For example, a chick goes around slandering your name by calling you gay and you just sit there taking it, afriad that if you defend yourself that you could get in trouble. BETA. You’ve been cupcaking with the same female for over 2 years without banging her. BETA. I could go on, but just because she’s cerebral and likes astronomy doesn’t mean that she doesn’t want a manly man. And the first manly man thing you can do is take this chick out of consideration and confront her. Next, go out and find you a female thats 100% cooperative and bang her.

Killer advice. He’s being very supplicative to this chick and putting her on a pedestal, which is a very bad mistake. Not to mention dlv from hell.

BTW Godhand, you a Cards guy too? I saw that you’re also from the 'Ville

[texaspete]

@mobocaster

I’m thinking one thing - She’s an attention seeking nutjob who likes (or mirrors) you and your attention enough to keep you on tenterhooks/around and throw a big spanner in your other social group interactions but “not that much” in any other way. Despite her looks/your attraction. By all means, go for a good time with her but at the same time, try very hard to keep some distance and perspective on her as IMO, it might not end well.

Good luck!

FYI you were 100% right on the money: She’s an attention seeking nutjob

[texaspete]

@Godhand

The more I read this thread, the more I wonder why you are so hung up on gaming women at your workplace?

Because I basically live there and it’s virtually impossible find women outside of healthcare who have a compatible schedule.

[mobocaster]

@texaspete

FYI you were 100% right on the money: She’s an attention seeking nutjob

Hi Pete. Has she got her hooks into a new “gay friend”/victim or got into any other histrionics you can tell us about?

[Roy_Dillon]

Texas, she ain’t worth the fucking oneitis my friend Since ya gotta work with her & she’s pry a valued employee at the hospital I would just GET OVER THE BITCH & dial down her drama & your own WTF feelings about her. She’ll react to your coolness by attempting to reel you back in (cos THATS how this type of undead bitch operates, trust me). Worst case you stake her in the heart after ya throw holy water at her nasty drama ass That will drive your dhv up thru the roof! And rid the world of one more worthless bloodsucking bitch…LOL

[Unique]

Sounds like a bitch, unless a person wears their sexuality on their sleeve you shouldn’t assume anything

[sweetybirdy]

No matter she really thinks you are gay or she makes it up for attention, her action of spreading the gossip per se is sufficient to conclude that she is inconsiderate and bitchy. Go for other trouble-free babes would be more sensible than sticking around with this trouble making microphone LOL

[Watervapor]

you really got to add some PUA techniques to your game i think. It may get you on the right track with “displaying higher social value” and “escalating sexual tension”

[texaspete]

@mobocaster

Hi Pete. Has she got her hooks into a new “gay friend”/victim or got into any other histrionics you can tell us about?

Now that she’s married she has started showing IOIs when her husband is around. More here… https://pheromonetalk.com/t/2012-anabolics-mones-log/54922/23

[Watervapor]

also yes- i agree “One-itis” is a terrible way to go- so get some reading in on tactics.

[Roy_Dillon]

@sweetybirdy

No matter she really thinks you are gay or she makes it up for attention, her action of spreading the gossip per se is sufficient to conclude that she is inconsiderate and bitchy. Go for other trouble-free babes would be more sensible than sticking around with this trouble making microphone LOL

;)Sweety is 100% correct here, this bitch is defo a twisted man-manipulator, look with shame what she’s doing to her new hubby in front of you…rubbing her ample tatas all over you in front of him She’s attempting to control him with jealousy (maybe she’s a Borderline Personality)…or if he dug it maybe she’s becoming a Hot Wife for him (which would indicate his extreme "submissive sexual pathology “) & actually gets off on watching other guys ravage & sexually degrade his Hot Wife …yes they’re out there, but an experienced Hot Wife will fully disclose her intentions to you. Often the sub-hub encourages such behavior & has some input into her choice of a sexual"ravager”. My bet is on her just being a cruel bitch…
"

[mobocaster]

@texaspete

Now that she’s married she has started showing IOIs when her husband is around. More here… https://pheromonetalk.com/t/2012-anabolics-mones-log/54922/23

Yes, that figures and also fits the pattern for women like her. Poor guy - She’s going to put him through hell in all sorts of ways and do her best to wind you-up/use you to wind him-up whenever they are both around you. Being aware of this should underly all future interaction you have with them.

Maybe you should detail some of the other things she’s done - The alarm bells are ringing over what you have said already. But maybe not, if you are past/wise to her now - Onwards and upwards!

[wildflower1958]

Women only say your gay when they dig you or feel you are too good for them. Women who say it within your hearing range, are testing your masculinity.

Many of these women are not real women but are immature girls. Secure women do not do this sort of thing for attention.

The other reality is that she hates men.

Stay away from this girl.