EPIC WTF - The object of my affection tells other women that I'm GAY

Field Reports & Anecdotal Experience Men's Pheromone Advice & Field Reports
1

Wow. It’s taken me two years to figure out wtf has been going on with this woman and I’m still a little bewildered. She sometimes “swoons” when she sees me, I’ve overheard her discussing my looks with a physician (“He’s handsome”), she is constantly asking other people their opinion of me. All along I’ve thought that she was obviously attracted but confounded about why she is constantly asking people what they thought of me. A few months ago I had a strong suspicion that she had purposefully interfered in my starting a relationship with a newly hired employee, but I let it go assuming “okay, so this proves she’s interested.” Tonight she and I had a very nice conversation and as I was walking away I overheard her clearly say to a woman she had just introduced me to – "No, he’s gay."

Let me summarize the story so far - the dates are taken from my previous posts. First, I call her the astrophysics babe because that is her main hobby. She’s got an Einstein level IQ. Second, she looks exactly like a young Winona Ryder. To me, that’s a perfect ten and, being middle aged, I can’t remember meeting another woman who consistently gives me an instant boner whenever I see them. So the reason why I can’t let this slide is very simple. The Astrophysics Babe = Viagra in a lab coat, and she does not think I’m socially acceptable but she is physically attracted to me.

Here’s a quick synopsis. Yes, the dates are exact. This issue goes back over 2 years…
2/23/2009 had dinner with her, I wore no 'mones except a t-shirt I slept in and possibly some remnants of chikara. fun, decent date but she went back to her friends and told them “God, what a dork.” I’ve got good hearing and a good memory. So sue me.
2/27/2009 3 x mx292 = no reaction
3/24/2009 3x IG, 2 x TUTH, 1 cops, 1 CTTM2 = nothing
6/9/09 4x ammo grabbed my arm, unbelievably friendly, so naturally I decided to ask her out again…
6/10/09 3x ammo, 1 tuth, shot me down when I asked her out
6/11/09 2x ammo 2x A314 2x cops 1x tuth I was the focus of (her) gossip, center of attention otherwise
10/8/2009 came up with Texas Pete’s General Hospital Mix:
3-4 Ammo + 1 Turn Up The Heat.
“It’s simple, consistent, coherent, safe to wear at work, and effective.
This is what I plan on running with 100% of the time, from now on.”

6/2/2010 A memorable thought:
I began “…to wonder what the hell is being said about me while I’m not around.”

6/3/2010 4x Ammo . 2x on back of neck and 1x on each forearm. results: cordial, smile, said hello (for the first time in a long time)

7/20/2007
“Edit: I forgot to note that working in a hospital, everyone assumes you’re queer, so it’s always a question and can become a battle if you let it. It’s just something I noticed lately, and would like to subtlly counter without making it an issue.”

So here’s the deal…
#1 She and I have shared interests, schedules, and hobbies (other than astrophysics)
#2 She is attracted to me and turns me on like nobody else has in years
#3 She seems to subconciously drop hints about her availability every once in awhile. I think she begins acting negatively towards me (passive-aggressively and socially) when I don’t immediately ask her out
#4 She tells other women that I’m gay, apparently when they ask about me or us. For all I know this may be a widespread opinion or rumor. I seriously only care what she thinks, not anyone else.
#5 I created a reason for her to explicitly seek me out (to share something with me) next week and she seems interested in it

I’m thinking 3 things:
#1 I’m a horny idiot who should be more insulted and weary than horny. But who wouldn’t try to bone the hell out of Winona Ryder if he thought he had the chance? I mean, seriously…
#2 Since she has reacted strongly to it on a few occasions, I should wear 4x ammo daily, but carefully scrub the hell out of my skin so it doesn’t accumulate and cause her to OD
#3 when we’re together next week I will not only bluntly ask her if she’s seeing someone, but I will first very clearly explain my feelings and ask her out.

Yes, ladies and gentleman, I just want to get her in bed. Well, either her or Winona Ryder…

http://www.realbollywood.com/news/up_images/winona-ryder3921.jpg

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2

Edit: Holy Mother of God. I just realized that it has been exactly two years since I first asked her out. Jesus that’s so fucking wierd…

3

Hmmm, one thing came to my mind. 2 years is a very long time, maybe she thinks indeed that you’re gay because you didn’t make a move by now?

You should get things going with this girl, in the past I’ve lost many girls because I’ve waited too long to make a move, and on the other side I didn’t loose a single one because I tried to heat things up too early :wink:

4

Hey texaspete,
You fell off the radar. What happened since the last time you were here?

ODG

5

On a positive note, I wonder if she’s just telling other women to keep you to herself :smiley:.. Possibly they find you attractive and spurt it out when having girl small talk amongst each other? Women are sneaky ninjas if you know what I mean. The girl I’m dating would hands down do that to repel other pursuing women…But that’s not the case for everyone. I’m wondering why would she tell everyone you’re gay? Does this happen often with other girls?

I’m just assuming things as I don’t know the whole situation about you guys. But nonetheless, if she does look like Winona..then holy sh*t!

6

I’m thinking one thing - She’s an attention seeking nutjob who likes (or mirrors) you and your attention enough to keep you on tenterhooks/around and throw a big spanner in your other social group interactions but “not that much” in any other way. Despite her looks/your attraction. By all means, go for a good time with her but at the same time, try very hard to keep some distance and perspective on her as IMO, it might not end well.

Good luck! :slight_smile:

7

Girls wont tell other girls your gay because they are attracted to you LOL

Either she is a attention seeking nutjob as mobocaster said or she thinks you are gay. A girl will rationalize and make that assumption when a guy shows interest but doesnt make a move or create sexual tension.

I am thinking you let this relationship fall into the friends box. Are you being congruent with your pheromones ?
You need to create some sexual tension. Do not explain your feelings to her. Create the tension. Clearly state what you want but not how you feel about what you want.

Tisha

8

Well, every time I’ve come across the “oh - he’s gay” scenario has involved a woman justifying why they are dating/having good times with a man but not getting into a relationship/sleeping with them and all of them have been quite nuts or actively leading him on.

The more normal ones tend to go for “he’s my best/special/closest male friend,” whilst sending out a public vibe that looks as close to being a couple as she can manage.

But yes, the OP needs to create tension (don’t explain anything) & take this into more sexual territory as soon as possible. If only to find out where he stands once and for all.

9

That’s kind of what I think. We’re both sending each other mixed signals, apparently. So apparently she’s attracted to me but thinks I’m gay.

I think she genuinely believes I’m gay. (Edit: I could be wrong. She could just be a batshit crazy witch, but she drops too many coincidental hints about her schedule and availabilty. I’ve decided to be batshit-crazy-persistent.)

No pheromones for the past few months, but I was never consistent.

How the hell do I do that given that she things I’m queer?

Help me, Tisha!

BTW, I Ordered a full bottle of Ammo (I haven’t done that in a long time) + P79 + P74 (See Ammo + P74 + P79 = WIIIIN!!!!!! )

Someone asked me what’s happened since my last post? I’ve had a few dates with women I really wasn’t interested in, and I’ve decided to stop dating women just because they’re interested in me. (Easy, low hanging fruit, blah blah blah…) And Money problems happened - which is the story of my life. And that’s why I never asked out this woman - lack of money, we’re in “different tax brackets”. I’m addressing that, and also hoping it doesn’t matter too much to her. I expect that it will, but I’m moving forward anyhow. I mean, two fricking years of pining for this woman! It’s as mind boggling as me wanting to break rule #3.

SO anyways - next week she is supposed to show me a piece of art that she recently created (…we’re both artists…) and she said she would bring it in to work to show to me. That’s my “pivotal moment”.

Advice, please…

10

But HOW :confused::confused::confused:

11

I honestly do not know and spent a good part of the night lying awake and wondering about that last night, but I resoilved to stop because I think that contemplating that is going a bit too far down the rabbit hole. It’s too hard to stay detached or unemotional about that line of thought.

Sometimes I think she looks kind of like Audrey Hepburn from certain angles. She’s intimidating to most people but the most intimidating thing to me is how much money she makes versus the fact that I sometimes used to call in sick to work because I couldn’t afford enough gasoline to make the drive and was waiting for a check to clear. Basically, I’m 'po (but currently working two jobs, so I’m doing better…) Anyhow, that’s a stark difference that couldn’t be ignored.

I’ve been told that she’s “out of my league” but I don’t feel that way. I do, however, think that most guys do feel that way due to her looks, income, and intellect. That, and she’s pretty flat chested which I’ve been told is a turn off to many guys.

12

The Ammo is a good ideal to give a sexy masculine vibe. Hold off on the P74 for now. She is comfortable with you so when alone and not in work add a shot of TUTH.

To create sexual tension you need to do a few things. This would be a hell of a lot easier if I was where you were coaching you LOL I usually demonstrate more when I help people with this. Now there are lots of ways to do this but I will give some examples below.

Body language…

First lets project masculine power >>>>

Square off your body, there was a reason your mama told you to stand up straight and pull your shoulders back. Stand with your feet shoulder width apart. When your walking around her walk powerfully dont drag your feet, tip toe, or use short choppy steps.

Dont cross your arms in front of you when your talking or lean to one or the other side.

When your sitting across from her or even if your in the same room as her sit relaxed but up straight with legs apart and one hand always close to your crotch. No dont touch yourself just sit it there comfortable on your thigh.

Now the tension begins >>>>

Prolong your eye contact. face your body fully towards her when interacting. Lean in when talking to her. Get in her space a little. Touch her…dont be a pig :stuck_out_tongue: I mean on her arm or shoulder when conversing. Bring attention to certain body parts of yours. If your cloths allow hook your thumbs in your front pockets and frame your package. When sitting across from her sit with your legs apart facing her.
If your close enough let your foot slide and touch her foot. If your talking and have decent eye contact going on, glance at her boobs and softly rub your stomach. Now I want to stress glance, dont gawk like a love staved Winona worshiper LOL Dont rub your tummy like your saying yummy. Just a soft slow touch with finger tips, sort of a cross between a rub and itching.

Now for the killer move >>>> The slow smile. Gets them every time. You need to sort of time it. If your just chatting and something remotely sexual or personal or date or hooking up wise comes up and what she is saying pleases you use the slow smile. Its not a big grin, its not a full face smile…its sort of a slow coy upturn of the lips. no teeth. Be sure to hold your eye contact when your do this.

So like when you were talking about hooking up to look at her art. This is pleasing to you. Its personal interaction… So you say something like “I would be happy to check out your art” glance at boobs… softly rub abs and hit her with the eye contact and slow smile. There you have sexual tension.

Now verbal tension >>>> Tease her, get mildly cocky, act like you know she is into you even if your not sure she is. Use innuendos when possible and the body language example I suggested above. Not every single time you talk to her but throw them in when you can. Do not tell her you think she hot and smart and you really like her. That is for later once you established a relationship. Jump into that to soon and its sweet and cute and well…gay LOL. Your better off showing your affection and interest in body language.

When you make plans to meet up or go out to eat or something always make it clear you consider it a date. Kiss her when its over even if its not a intimate kiss but a short peck. Suppose your both leaving, just walk toward her with the powerful body language I talked about above… put your hand on her back or forearm… say had a great time, see you tomorrow and lean in and give her a kiss…then walk away like it was no big deal. Unless of course she responds with arousal then you can take it from there.

Now dont get all flamboyant just incorporate what you can into your interactions with her. Practice on others to. After a while it will just come natural. Learning body language is like learning to speak.

Tisha

13

I like this thread. Here are my 2 cents.
Although there is a type of woman out there that will ruin your every other chance with anyone else so that no one can have you just for the fun of it, I don’t think that’s what is going on. I think she really does think you are gay.
Allow me to be transparent for a moment. In highschool up until the middle of my 10th grade year I was a geek. I decided to make some changes that allowed me to pick up one of the hottest girls in school. Rumors quickly spread. At the bus stop one attractive girl said she didn’t believe it, because she thought I was gay. I got pissed and asked her why she thought that. She said it was because I never hit on her. Apparently she had given signals, and because she was so confident in herself then I must be gay for not going after her. She had no clue it was because of her personality that I wasn’t interested.

It sounds like you already know your problem here. You are intimidated by her salary and you let it affect you. Women with a strong drive at work often display masculine energy, but outside of work they may still have a feminine core. (David Daeda). So in their love life the seek a man that has more masculine energy then they portray. They want a guy that’s not intimidated or afraid to just take charge. You have a case of oneitis that is killing your chances. Plus the money issue is eating away at your confidence. I’m sure that you wearing TUTH at work only confuses her more, because if she is attracted to you and you increase her sexual desire, but she views you as unattainable then that would be frustrating.
I recommend that you wear a314 and ammo. Read Intimate Communion. And limit your social time around her while at work. If you get another date, take her somewhere where she can be feminine and you can be the man. Plan the date before hand. Don’t let her make any decisions except for maybe her meal if you go out to eat. Order for her.

Don’t turn into a pushy overbearing dick. The goal is not to dominate her but to lead and assume that she will follow because you are worth following.

14

Looks like Tisha posted while I was typing. Good stuff as usual Tisha.

15

Hmmm. Yes, 2 years is a long time. If I were you, I’d sit her down or something, and tell her what’s going; you don’t want to be friends. I was also thinking you should just let it go, because if she is an attention seeker…well, I won’t go there, but I could care less about women who want attention/egg you on. I don’t know man. You have a thing for her, and it’s been 2 years, so make a firm push/move on her and let her know what’s up. I wouldn’t want to be wasting my time. Maybe the telling her might backfire, but I hope you see where I’m going with this. You should do something about it; take charge. Like I said, let her know, and if she seems uninterested…Next! But it’s hard to let go of something you really like.

16

As they say on ESPN … C’MON, MANNNNNNNNN!

Pete! Two years and no booty!? :open_mouth:

Are you?

Are you tip toe-ing through the tulips?

Are you gay? :smiley:

Please don’t tell me you haven’t gotten laid in two years! :cool:

Give her lots of space, less phone calls, and change your signature.

Man up! A314 + whatever else you decide on, my friend, and make sure it’s hanging to the right.

17

A quick conversation about previous partners could end that. I think that the overbearing sexuality of androstenone could be interpreted as homosexual. The “macho” vibe, ‘erect’ lol body language and attentiveness to female response could elicit a homosexual image that the observer would increase through confirmation bias.

However, it should be relatively easy to diffuse. I get in that situation more often than not, because i’m Canadian, skinny and not that bad looking. When people learn about my viewpoints and personality it can sway towards gay unless I assert my heterosexuality. There are lots of ways you can do this, and I think in your situation it would be best to be indirect. That is, until she realizes you are straight.

18

How about this approach?

:smiley::smiley:

Just joshing. I’m a dunderhead too, when it comes to reading females. With my wife I just came out and told her that I wanted to kiss her. That was after I told her that I didn’t want to be friends, I had enough friends already. She kind of took it from there after I made my intentions clear in my own crude manner. No coy smiles or subtle building tension from me. I’m too dumb. Now she often clues me in when women are checking me out or sending subtle cues of interest my way. For them it may be subtle building tension but generally the signals are sailing right over my head. After a while they figure out I’m gay, or they get a nasty look from my wife and figure out I’m taken.

19

More like two years and no booty worth posting about - and it had nothing to do with mones. :frowning:

I don’t know. I posted because I was totally - what - flabbergasted? More like blown away. (There are no words…) But now that it’s a day later, I’m pissed. This place is filled with tons of women hot or hotter than her - I get shot down daily - so often that it’s completely meaningless - (and I should probably actually post a few of the funnier ones…) so I have no problem with shyness or anything like that, but for some reason I’m fixated on her - basically I just want a piece of that. With her I’m like a moth to a flame. If it were anyone else, anywhere else, I’d be able to turn this into a game, make it “the pheromone experiment from hell”, but I have to work with her friends daily. As it stands, if I crash and burn in this case, I’ll never hear the end of it from everyone I work with and it seems logical that all of her friends are at least aware of her opinion. Whether or not they share it is another quandary.

The thoughts going through my mind are so odd now that I’m afraid to act upon any of them so forgive me for not responding to every post to this thread. I kind of want to ruminate on this situation for awhile, but please keep the posts and advice coming…

Oh, BTW, A314 never worked for me while I’m at work.

20

Had that conversation already.

Well fuck me all to hell. I think confirmation bias is in full effect. Anything I say can and will be misinterpreted. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.

Confirmation bias - Wikipedia Confirmation bias is like social doom, man. :open_mouth: Holy fuck I’m screwed!

I’m an artist, so that means I’m “obviously” gay, right? Well, this is what I’m thinking they believe… I’m sweet and nice, so I’m gay… Great bedside manner = gay… I dress well = gay… I don’t shun the gay guys = gay, I do MMA and wrestling = gay, bodybuilder= gay… catholic=gay, politically liberal= gay, fuck - anything I use to describe myself… in their minds, they’re going to think “gay, gay, gay”. As a matter of fact, just reading this post is going to affect at least some readers of it, some are going to say “Wow, you really are gay” - just because it’s been suggested - and once the seed of an opinion has been planted, confirmation bias comes into play and everything will look like the suggested opinion. That’s how it works, and I really don’t think it’s so easily mitigated. :frowning: