I’m really shy when it comes to women. Sometimes I stutter and shake. How do I get rid of this. I’m really sick of being the way I am. Just want to be confident and loved by people, especially women..
First of all you have to do it more. Just make yourself do it no matter how much it sucks and just own it. You have to believe in yourself and make sure you are confident in you. Adopting an approach where you care less about what other people think is a good way to start. It’s not easy and takes time but it seems like you’re too worried about what people think, which makes you nervous. It took time for me to get rid of shyness around girls but I’m doing pretty well with it now. And not only women but talk to everyone more… guys included, and just practice being more confident in front of them, as you probably feel more comfortable with guys as it is. Just start being a bit more confident in all aspects of life and eventually it WILL get better… if you do it all of a sudden some day you’ll realize that you’ve come a long ways since ‘today’.
A314 pheromone wise can help you too. It raised my confidence wuite a bit over the last year, as it is a gradual thing either way, to change confidence levels. I would try A314 with some IH. This will raise your confidence and let people feel comfortable and chatty around you, which will in turn help make you feel more comfortable with the situation in general.
Hope this helps!
Try meditation and hypnosis to build up your confidence. it worked for me. Like empath said It’s not easy and it takes time! don’t give up
I could see meditation working because it just calms you down. How did hypnosis work? How effective was it?
You can convince yourself anything with self hypnosis like your building self confidence by making your subconscious think that you’re more confident, eliminating phobia and fears and other stuffs. It’s not as hard as it may seem like in the movies, actually it’s more like positive thinking. For example when you think of something happy or a happy moment, you become happy and relaxe. It work the same way with confidence. Meditation is usually mix with hypnosis, to clear your mind before giving yourself some what the call “suggestions”. I’ve been meditating and doing that stuff for 5 years, back then i was a shy guy, now nothing really matters. I’ve never been that confident with womens in my life.
Sounds pretty great,
So do you go to a hypnotist or do you just meditate until you’re in the zone and then think good thoughts about yourself?
Try reading some books about self-hypnosis and what they call “sophrology” its a new science that use meditating and self hypnosis. I’ve never consult a hypnosis, it’s all try and error by reading books and praticing. I’ve build up my own tricks and technics by the years. but the books are veryhelpful to start (youtube videos could be easier if you dont want to read).
I thinks that the mones works to get hits and to help change the perception of how others sees you (make people think your confident ). But i don’t think it has much influence facts that you’re still nervous and shy with other people.
Yea I’m going to have to look it up.
Paul Mckenna is a pretty good hypnosis, you can try to find some of his self-hypnosis audio session to achieve self confidence, happiness, wealth, etc… I’ve start by listening to them back then, and still use it sometimes, its very relaxing. all you have to do its to listen to the audio and relax for 30 minutes. So you don’t have to learn all the basics of meditation. After the session you’ll feel your self energized and more confident 
What are the reasons you’re shy?
Is it because you’re intimidated? Is it because you don’t know what to say?
Being loved by people in general is directly correlated to how much you love yourself. Self confidence shows, shyness in my opinion is the inability to be secure with who you are and therefore have to take the “safe” action and that’s how shyness comes about.
I remember years ago when I was so shy I didn’t want to go anywhere else, I always hesitated and saw great moments and opportunities pass me by, and I never had the courage to go for it.
You essentially have to force yourself to get into situations to help get you out of it. Having the courage of facing that fear is the best way to solve your problem. You will get to that point where you’re going to say, “no more I’m not living like this anymore” and you’re just going to change, it’ll be a slow and a big learning experience, but you have to decide to start to go there.
It is just like everything else out there, all the fears you have will essentially be very manageable. I don’t know anyone who has no fear. I do know a lot of people who have it, but built up such courage to face those fears, that it seems like they don’t.
I’ve always said, strap in, hang on, man up, and go. It was because one of the major events that helped me get over my fear, was jumping out of a plane. I was to the point where I had to be medicated to fly on airlines, legitimate doctor approved medication. I said to myself, I’m not going to be a prisoner, and I went, did it, and now whenever I have a fear of doing something, approaching a girl, I always look back and say to myself “If you did that, faced your biggest fear in life, you can approach this gorgeous woman standing at the bar”.
Since then, a lot of things have changed, and I’ve gone back skydiving, and kept facing that fear every time I go. Point being, just because you overcame it once, doesn’t mean its done and its over. You will have to keep doing it over and over again to be better suited to deal with that. I’m on my way to getting my A license so I can jump by myself, and I still cringe to this day thinking about doing that, but heck, you face it and you do it.
Once you shed all those restrictions, you’ll find out more about yourself and develop your confidence and be able to go and do the things you’re trying to acheive. I’m not saying that you have to go and do what I did, but you have to take life head on, that’s the only way you’ll keep moving forward. To be loved and be respected, you have to with yourself first.
Oh and stop with the self defeating terms. Stop feeling sorry for yourself.
Get rid of your nickname, and have Steve change it to something else.
That’s the first step you can take.
The only way that you can overcome your shyness is to be around people and talk to them. Practice. Start off slowly. Make eye contact and if the person seems to be in a good mood, smile politely. You can also make eye contact, say hello, the person will say hello back and go on about your business. Some people, you will say hello to many times before a converstaion is started. No biggie. Other people are more friendly, and will start talking to you right away. You can practice your converstational skills with anybody. When you talk to women, you’re better off starting out with women who you don’t find physically attractive because you won’t feel as intimidated. Eventually, your confidence and your communication skills will build up, and you will start talking to lots of different people. As long as you put yourself out there. By saying hello to some people, others will see that you are approachable, and will be open to talking to you. You might come across some people who will start to annoy you. Never blow anyone off, because others are watching even when you don’t notice, and it will turn them off. They will not want to talk to you if they see you doing that. Be nice instead, use the situation to work on your people skills, and use it to turn what could be a negative into a positive. The more you practice, the easier it will become to have positive experiences with people. There are many self help books that can help prepare you mentally. There is one that I believe is called “how to start converstations with anyone”. I like that one. It shows you when people are ready to be approached by you just based on their body language. I’ll have to edit later with the author’s name. As far as pheromones go, try p83. I know I seem to talk about it in every single post, but it is an awesome pheromone. If you want to build up your confidence, you need to not concern yourself with failure, and p83 will help you with that. It makes me feel carefree and confident. As a result, people view me as more outgoing and approach me more often. To build your confidence, start out with your body language. Develop good posture and walk upright. Start believing in yourself. If you tell yourself that you’re a loner, you will believe that, and that’s what you will become. Our minds are amazing, we become what we believe. What we believe about ourselves is what we project, and that’s what people will see when they read us.
Don’t watch porn, it destroys your character. stay away from porn for 1 month and watch how you feel inside and how brave you become interacting with everyone. You would start viewing women as humans and not as sexual objects. When you start viewing them as humans. Then, you would begin to care more about their personality then their looks, which wont intimidate you anymore, since it is not as important as it used to be
Not saying that he’s doesn’t watch porn, but he hasn’t said anything to indicate that he does so that’s kind of a big and potentially offensive assumption to be making.
And his issues seem to go beyond simply being intimidated by females. He seems to feel his issues are across the board social anxiety. Not sure how watching porn might influence his ability to act socially with males as well.
What is the secret to being good with women?? Having Money,fame power, status? All those are just ends to a mean and they all have one thing in common. The men that have all those traits are what? Confident. Confidence is the key to success with women my friend. The Secret to being good with women is to know that you already are. Every night before I go to bed I tell myself that I am a babe magnet. Confidence is not a trait its a lifestyle.Be confident from the time you wake up to when you are dreaming. I wake up go into the bathroom and see the mirror what do I think? Damn I am sexy,Hugh Heffner has nothing on me. In everything I do I do it well. May it be getting food to eat or playing basketball. I put my effort into it and do it well. If you live it you become it.
When you go out be gaming people. In a supermarket? Flirt with the cashier ask her how her day has been going, comment on how busy it is or something. Everyday tasks like that are perfect opportunities to get better with social skills and confidence. Look for opportunities to talk to women. You dont even have to get the girls number. Just start by asking a womens opinion a book(women love to discuss this stuff)
As far as products go for being shy I would say Shine,IO,or IJ and spaceland(takes the edge off and gives you a I don’t give fuck what happens I just wanna have a good time vibe,also good for approach anxiety). Spaceland IMO is the best approach helper.Mones only do so much for you man like Steve(correct me if I am wrong) Its 90% you and 10% mones. So just get out and have a good time, read some books on killing approach anxiety. Search for stuff by christian hudson or derek lamont, or just go to google and search become a PUA(Pick Up Artist). All these things will help you. Take all the advice you get here and use it. “A car will only go as fast as the driver is willing to go”
Watching porn is a subliminal message to the viewers, just as watching day to day television. For instance you see a commercial for beer and you notice that men with beer have all the sexy women around so they make you believe if you drink our beer, sexy women will come your way.
For porn, it’s the same. They want to keep you hook on their models or newer models. Each time you let loose to any of these women, chances are you’re thinking “man I’d like to fuck her,” but instead you’re creating messages that you aren’t good enough for a woman like that. There’s no face time either so you’re only looking at her through a computer screen; creating more problems in the back of your mind.
As for the topic creator, I don’t have much advice. Start by making friends with someone, meet their friends, and keep making more friends. I’m pretty shy myself so I’m not the best person to take advice from.
I am not Steve, but you are wrong! Mones can be 50% and you 50%. However, it is mostly the case with CONFIDENT and SUCCESSFUL guys.
Try blasting yourself with CTTM2 and then go out with the intent of just talking to people. You can talk to men and women both since you aren’t trying for a pick up.
After you see how easy talking can be, look up some info on “pick up artist” websites and work some of that in. They can give you very effective tools for communicating with women.
It doesn’t take long if you work at it, but it does take work.
The most interesting thing about -mones is not their effect on others; it’s their potential for helping with self-improvement. Pheromones can help you change yourself for the better.