So I’m still trying to move on, not letting him confide in me, and yet he still continues to talk to me like we’re good friends… Which I wanna be so badly except last night I was faked out (thought him and the girl weren’t seeing each other anymore when they were) and spent the whole night awake… got barely any sleep and I’m tired of it. I like talking to him, but not if it’s going to put me on this emotional roller coaster. I even had nightmares about him that were telling me I needed to cut off this unnecessity.
So now…
I’ve come here to ask.. How do I break it off with him? Idk if this will be complete, but at least until I can get over this and move on.
I told him about the dream and he wants to know what the dream meant and what I thought I should cut out of my life… I told him I would say anything until I could say it right… Sooo how do I go about telling someone I can’t talk to them because it hurts too much… without offending them and making them hate me and never wanna talk to me again?
Well that’s kinda what I said, but I’m looking for something more like: Should I straight up tell him I don’t want to talk to him for a while, or should I just stop talking to him without saying anything?
Not saying anything makes things confusing for the guy. Tell him straight up, “You’re such a _______ man, I’m so happy that I can talk to you but right now I need my space. I hope you understand.”
That way, you rub his ego a bit and glaze over the negative part as easily as possible. He’d look like a jerk saying, “no I don’t understand.”
Yeah, just really sucks cus I wanna be his friend, but this new girl is and him talking about her to me is doing anything but making me wanna talk to him.
I had a situation like that once. This guy I was seeing cheated on me with this blonde girl, the weird thing is, she cheated on her bf to get with him! After, a couple people approached her to tell her that the guy was bad news and what he did to me, well, after that, the girl started approaching me and talking to me about it! lol, it’s funny because they’re both in a committed relationship now, but still… it was a really painful experience for me at the time and hearing them mention the other kept like salting my wounds in a way. I actually reccomend cutting off contact for a while (I did it for a whole semester) and just taking care of your own needs and finding your own happiness. You’ll know you can talk to him again when it doesn’t matter whether you do or not
My current problem is that I’ve been eating peanut butter sandwiches and soup for the past two weeks because I’ve been worried about running into my ex. He’s an assistant chef at my college. I will have to eventually (want to order some instant sexiness B first =P). I’m at the point where I’ve let go, but I still would take him back if he wanted me (does that make sense?)
Wow, that sounds like a horrible experience. idk why but my last two exes have dated blondes right after me. I’m just like..why? you tired of looking at brunnette hair.
Anywho, I really have this urge to just not talk to him…like I’ve been hurt so much it’s caused this trigger in my mind to want to shut off any good thoughts of him. It’ll suck getting over him since I’ve liked him the longest, but I know that once I do get over him I most likely won’t like him like that again just like with all my other exes.
Yeah what is it with blondes? (has natural brown hair) ugh. I thought guys were supposed to like brunettes lol.
If you must shut off the good thoughts of him, my advice would be not to think of him at all because you don’t want to develop a chip on your shoulder, y’know. Just breathe in the fresh air and don’t think about all the shit that went wrong and what he did to you. Just keep positive because you’re worthy of someone who thinks you’re incredible Good karma, I believe
Yeah, I’m gonna try to not thinking about him… kinda hard to shut off thoughts of someone you’ve known for 4 yrs tho.
Like I’ve said before… just wish I had someone else to like so I could get over the pain easier.
Yeah sometimes being single sucks. But sometimes I don’t think I’d even be fair to the person I was dating. I’m still a little attached to the other person even though it’s over. I’m taking 13 classes this semester, running two clubs, performing gigs, doing my first semester of field, I feel like they’d feel cheated because I couldn’t see or talk to them all the time y’know? But I sometimes wish I had someone who I could just cuddle up with at the end of the week
Yeah I understand you there. A few months back I was trying to get in a relationship with another guy and I still liked my ex. In the end I just couldn’t let go and I ended up breaking if off with the other guy cus I liked my ex too much. Sucks… Makes me wonder if now that my ex has someone if it will be easier to move on or if this affinity is something I can’t just push away so easilly… if ever. Ugh. Wasn’t this hard when I dated me ex to get over my other ex. Makes me wonder if my ex was the one who got away…
13 classes? Wow, how do you manage that many?
I really need to keep busy myself. I’ve applied for a job, but no call back yet. I was hoping that staying busy might help my loneliness, but if you’re that busy it makes me wonder if I’ll ever be able to be cool with just being by myself. Guess I am only human and we do need love. Sucks waiting for that special person, but it’s always nice to talk to someone about it who understands where I’m coming from.
I wonder that same thing with my ex too, but only time will tell me the answer to that. But I try to think “if things are meant to be, then they will be.” we can’t force someone to love us, even though we want to badly. and no matter what, we’re all going to be okay even if things aren’t ideal. If this guy is meant to be with you, then one day he will be with you, but don’t wait for it because life is too short right?
and to answer your question, I don’t even know anymore. I haven’t had a weekend in 2 years lol. My major is insane. and being busy does help with the pain if you really throw yourself into it. Like, when my ex and I broke up I just threw myself into a practice room instead of crying and practiced flute for like 4 hours. and when I can’t practice I write, or go running. I just find something to occupy myself or I get lost. Friends are also good =)
Yep, true. Only time will tell. I totally agree.
Just talked to him and apparently him and the girl are an item now. Sad day I did run by the not talking to him for a while thing tho.. I’ll let you know what he says.
Yeah I like to run to occupy my time and my mind. But it’s so cold right now that it’s not an option. Music helps a lil too, as long as I pick something that’s not depressing of course. And yes friends are great. Just sucks cus I live in an apt all by myself so when I’m lonely the tears come
Yeah, none for me. I find I get more down that way. Instead I listen to upbeat music and inspiration CD’s.
So I ended up talking to my ex till he went to bed. I can tell he’s not happy about me not talking to him for a bit, but I also told him he was a great guy and that I felt it was best for me if I wanted to move on and so I wouldn’t get on his nerves.
I have no idea if I will move on… not even sure how long I’ll be absent from his life. But up till now I have been nice and cordial about the new gf thing which will help me in the long run because I still want him to like me as a person… and I still have a tiny glimmer of hope that things could steer back towards him.
Who knows… maybe this new girl is just a stepping stone, another lesson that he needs to learn before he’s ready for me. I kno I kno. Wishful thinking… but I kinda like that hope. Keeps me alive. Keeps me praying.
No I know exactly how you feel. It’s how I feel about my ex (who is single) and the guy that cheated on me last year. One day maybe they’ll realize they missed out but I’m not gonna hold my breath.
Yeah…it’s weird. I go this long with knowing him and yet I still like him. Despite him and me dating, breaking up, dealing with him dating someone else and now dealing with him dating again.
I’m kinda hoping that he’ll realize like all my other exes that I was the one that got away.
Yeah, here’s one my hopes. My dream scenario goes like this: I walk into that cafeteria looking pretty, and happy. Guys are noticing me and paying attention to me. I say hello to my ex and smile and keep going on with my day. I hope something like that will happen.
Like I said, I’m cool without him but I would take him back if he wanted me. But if something is meant to be then it will. Maybe one day? Perhaps.
Good karma, I believe 