A girl I’m acquaintances with at a restaurant is very friendly with me there but has told me before in text message she believes interaction outside the restaurant is forbidden by the management because of the rules there not her own desires.
How can I get her to see me as a potential mate and not just a client? We talk, we communicate, we socialize. She is friendly with me.. I compliment her etc etc.
I want to ask her on a date on my next visit but fear she will say 2 things:
“i have a boyfriend” as to which I’ll pull out John’s fabulous line “Well you can tell him about us but I’d prefer if we keep it a secret”
or
“I want to remain professional at work” and I need a comeback line or response to get her thinking romance to this scenario.
Can you folks who’ve encountered situations like this give me some tips.How would you go about this? I dress fashionably all the time. She notices this. I need to spark some switches in her that says “I want this guy… i want to see what he’s like as long as it doesn’t get me in trouble with my job”
Thanks for the tips.. Mones suggestions welcome too if you think IS IO IH AMmo is wrong.. She’s 21 white.
Look, this is likely an excuse. Blaming it on the rules of management is a way to reject you in a polite way.
If you think it’s a real reason it could make sense to speak to the management. If you ask the boss “Do you mind if I ask out one of your waitresses?”, there a chance that he will say “No”.
Yeah I just hate it went she’s so polite and composed to me during work but treats me this way outside of work.. She can just shut off/on her feelings/behavior like a tap.
I’m pursuing other women now so I have my options open.
She is not really shutting on and off her feelings. She is in the service business. Its her job to act friendly, polite and composed and be attentive to the customers.
Management not allowing interaction outside of work is what they call a gentle rejection. I have used it myself when “I am married” doesn’t work. Management does not have a right to tell you who you can see or not see in your off time. They can frown on it but they cant do much about it without legal ramifications.
Frankly I wouldnt ask management because that would be over stepping your bounds and make her go into stalker alert mode then she is going to shield. I have done this as well. I have men who order things just so I will have to come to there door to deliver it. If they havent gotten the hint yet I will ask one of the male carriers to do it for me and they will. Ordinarily outside of work I would just tell them bluntly but in work you do not want to piss off the customers or you piss off management.
Treating you nicely at work doesn’t mean that she has romantic feelings for you.
If a woman puts you into her friend zone she treats you nicely. She’s polite to you.
It depends on what dsouza wants.
If he wants to challenge polite excuses with lines like “Well you can tell him about us but I’d prefer if we keep it a secret” than she has no other way or either going to him on a date or going into stalker alert mode.
For dsouza it might be value to get push for a definite Yes/No answer, that allows him either date her or to move on.