So heres the thing… For years I’ve been really BAD socially, like handicapped bad… I’m charming and charismatic and so on, but I had bad people skills, and also I was in bad company, with girlfriends who made me think I wouldn’t fit in anywhere (jalousy I think). My head was a mess, and I closed myself into a bubble, that only a few penetrated and most of them was thrown out again, mostly because I didn’t feel like they cared enough/as much as I did. I pushed up a wall saying “rather have a few good friends than many bad” but really the few was barely real friends, just people I hung out with at parties. My mother says I’ve been lonely all my life, even in periods when I was really popular, and I think shes right…
However, I’ve dealth with anxiety problems in therapy and it has oppened up a whole new world for me. Now I feel like I have a bunch to offer, and to gain from friendships, Iøm not scared of friends hurting me, I’m “free” or so to speak And for the first time in years I actually WANT more friends
I’m moving to a new city, where I have a few friends, one of them a really good girlfriend. I asked her to invite people to a party I’m throwing this friday, and some of them luckely said yes I’ve told her that I’m mostly interested in girlfriends (I’ve always had guyfriends, but I realise most of them really was just in love with me, or the friendship ended when they found a girlfriend). However I’m baaaaad at interacting with girls
Any tips out there?
So far I’ve got:
Don’t dress as hot as I normally would - Don’t want them to see me as too much of a competition (many of them are in relationships)
Maybe give them the impression I’m into someone else (which is true, but I do NOT want them to know who, and since he is like a 5-year plan, I still see others, because in a way I hope I can just get over him instead, he is like climbing K2 )
Have you met some of the other girls? If you have a good even if its brief, interaction with some of them, at the store, shopping, getting some coffee… with your mone cloud on with at ease vibes… That could help.
I’d suggest you talk to this girlfriend you have already and ask her what her recommendations are for this shin dig… she knows these girls and could easily help with food, environment, and music decisions…
I’m sure the gals will come on by and respond with their suggestions!!! Much better ones, I’m sure!
How did your party go? I always get jumped and hated for saying this but since I have known myself I have had nothing but bad luck with girls as friends.
Currently taking stock of my life and who I should let in as friends most of my g/fs has been cut of literally from my life.
I always find that girls tend to be more jealous ; negative and would stab you in the back more than a guy friend would. Of course , everyone experience is different.
With that being said you are young and although not all experiences are good and some you should never go through as a woman experiences help us learn and grow. Don’t limit yourself.
In addition, we are social beings so I say you should open yourself up more and see where your friendships or even connections take you. Be careful of course but still be open.
Even if they won’t be life long friends it’s important to build a strong social network that will help you go far in the future.
I’ve only met one, the close friend, the rest are complete strangers. My friend describes the girls as all having completely different personalities, and most don’t know each other either, so I’ll just have to do everything my own way ()
It’s this friday, so I can’t tell you yet
In my experience most girls are complete bitches but those who aren’t is worth dealing with the rest for
I need the real, not based on him being attracted to me, friendships and I’ve never had that close of a friendship with a guy who didn’t dream of getting with me…
Except for gay guys and girls my boyfriend doesn’t believe girls and guys can be friends.
I totally disagreed until I went through my long list of guys friends and realized all of them wanted me at one point and might still do.
I have read on the forum of some women who have successful friend relationships with men. Tisha stands out because she is married and although it works because her hubby understands I wouldn’t want my guy having a best friend who is of the opp sex even more so if we were married. I guess that is just me.
Good luck with the party and I am glad you are taking a positive approach to this.
I think it depends on how hot they are. My best girlfriend has a best friend and her boyfriend don’t mind because the friend is not at ALL treathening to him. But I wouldn’t EVER be okay if the girl was a total dream-girl and my boyfriend obviusly would take her if she wanted him. Sometimes my guy-friends has had that relationship with me, and I’ve always felt sorry for their girlfriends.
And for the first time in years I actually WANT more friends 
I’ve told her that I’m mostly interested in girlfriends (I’ve always had guyfriends, but I realise most of them really was just in love with me, or the friendship ended when they found a girlfriend). However I’m baaaaad at interacting with girls 
