I know this is not a dating or PUA forum per se. I just trust you guys and the folk here a bit more than people in the aforementioned community forums.
I have posted about this specific girl before, but I believe that things have changed.
Long story short:
- Girl “B” approached me together with a female friend of hers. Her friend left, we kept talking. Parted our ways, did not keep exchange contacts. Saw her occasionally on her workplace (a ferry terminal/ticket office). We were both flirty, but did not escalate. I did not fancy her that much back then - only after chatting with her and dating her did really get to know her. She is of Belorussian origin, though she is fluent in Estonian - my native language and the official language here.
- Fast forward 2 years. Girl “B” approached me before boarding a ship. She told me she would be on the same ship with me. Met girl “A”, before seeing girl “B” onboard. Dated girl “A”. Girl “A” and “B” were friends.
- Girl “B” added me as a friend in Facebook. Chatted a lot while I was dating girl “A”. She was the initiator. Asked her on an unofficial date while not yet broken up with girl “A”. She agreed, but claimed she forgot it.
- Screwed it up with girl “A”. Broke up/left like a wuss. Sent girl “B” the first text message the night I “broke up” with “A”
- Went on a date with girl “B”. It went well, she enjoyed it, chatted a lot afterwards. Did not escalate physically, though. No holding hands, i.e. Big mistake.
- She was happy to go on a second date. I forgot to confirm it, and she did not show up. She avoided the dating line of talk from there on. I asked her to the movies. She told me she would like to, but not now.
- Chatted quite a lot, but less than before, until it died out. Had a break of ca 4 months. She did initiate a chatting session on a few seldom occasions.
- Gave her gifts. At first she liked them and thanked me for them - when we were still chatting. When the chatting died out and I gave her more gifts she became annoyed with me.
- Decided to ask her if she was mad at me - either for dating her friend, or for some other reason. She told me she was not aware of me dating her friend and was not mad at me. I asked her out. She point blank refused. The next day she had likely blocked me from Facebook. She unblocked me and blocked me again, until she finally unblocked me.
- Started using pheromones. Saw her at her work place (a ferry terminal). She was very receptive and flirty. Initiated a long chatting session - first time in months.
- I saw her several times onboard a ship where she got a second job. Experimented with different pheromones and mixes with different results. Mostly positive. Got her to play with his hair, touch her lips, giggle and so on.
- She was on a cruise with a female friend of hers. I asked her to hold a seat for me, which she did not. She promised to listen my karaoke singing, which she did not do either.
- Went on a new cruise and saw her. She was very receptive again, and asked me to fetch her some water from the cafeteria. Figured it was a shit test so I asked for something in return. She gave me a banana and I got her water.
- Decided to play a little trick with her. Gave her a Cast Puzzle to solve with the promise of a candy if she solved it. She did, and I offered her ONE chocolate candy. She became incredibly mad with me. I offered to take her to coffe instead, she refused amd showed thumbs up when I told her I won’t ask her again.
- Thought I was screwed. Then again getting such an emotional reaction indicated that she does have some kind of emotions towards me. So I tested the water and went to see her the next cruise. I saw her for a short period only, but she was happy to see me, and we had a good talk.
- Had a box of gold-coated chocolates made in a confectionery and took them with me on the next cruise. She was happy to see me, we had a more deep conversation and when I was about to leave I asked her to close her eyes. She was hesitant at first, asked me why she should do that. I told her she should, because I said so. She immediately closed her eyes and made the cutest smile I have ever seen. I placed the chocolate box in front of her. I should habe sneaked a touch in and complimented her smile. Did neither. Big mistake.
- Saw her in the terminal a week after. Upon my question she told me which of the chocolates she liked the best.
- She initiated a chatting session a few weeks later. This was the first time for almost a year. Long too, we chatted for several days.
- Stumbled upon girl “A” in a shopping centre. This time I had my composure and a good pheromone mix (1x IG; 2,5mcg P75). She was happy to see me and we had a good and deep talk. She has a boyfriend for some time now and is pregnant). Showing myself in a good light and leaving a good impression should serve me well, if it was the wussy breakup with her that damned my chances with girl “B” in the first places. I could not tell her to say greetings to “B” however. I did bring it up however when I met “B” the next time, telling her that I met one of our mutual friends and having her guess. She did, in fact, guess almost everybody else but not her, so I had to tell her it was “A” whom I met, telling her she was pregnant and so on. She was quite interested in what we talked about.
- Saw her on a cruise again. She was busy, but told me she would listen to everything I say. We did however have a two-sided conversation. While before I had offered more solutions to her problems, this time I listened and aknowledged them. There were occasional passengers whom she was supposed to serve. I let them past me, but she did say jokingly (in a serious way) that they must wait in line. I ended up being short of topics to talk about. She helped me though, bringing new things up. Talked about the cruise where we first met among other things. She got thirsty and wanted some water. Perhaps she expected me to offer to fetch it for her, but as that did not happen, she asked me if I too wanted something to drink. I then told her I’d take some water too. She went to the cafeteria and bought 3 bottles of water. One for her and two for me. I also asked her for some fruits which she gave me.
- Planned to ask her out the next evening, but as I approached the information desk, where she works - I saw the ships security officer with an arrogant guy. The guy then came to the information desk and started complaining about the ship, the crew and everything else. I ended up getting in an argument with him. He ultimately withdrew, but it was a negative experience for both me and for her. While I did protected her in a way, so he directed her anger towards me, she had still trouble doing her paperwork. I had a brief talk with her and she was interested in how my day had beem. Still, she said she needs to finish her paperwork first before she could talk more actively - she was already behind on it - telling me she would be able to talk in about an hour. I would not wait for that nor show any neediness so I wished her “good night”. She said “good working” - The words “night” and “work” sound quite the same when added into this phrase. Thus my plan on asking her out failed. Also, I believe I may have overdosed on this occasion, as might have added a new mix before the first one had worn off - I added the first mix at around 19.00 with more socials in-between, and the second one at 00.00.
Now, the question is: What could the girl be thinking? Usually when they send mixed signals, it shows low interest. Then again the way she got mad at me shows that she has emotions related to me. Also, depending on the pheromone mixes, her body language has shown a lot of interest.
She has me puzzled. Certainly, pheromones have helped me a lot. The question remains though. Is this still the case of a classic friend zone? Or could she genuinely be interested in me? In both cases any recommendations would be greatly appreciated. ![]()