I voted Muscle tonality, Smell, The way he walks (movement), The way he looks at you, **Ability to lead other men and other.
**What matters most to me naturally depends on how long we have interacted. I would say in the first moment you can only rely on that you perceive with your senses and possibly the reputation of a man. Okay, I’m very aware of why I feel what I feel, so here come a long post:
Smell is very important to me, if his bodysmell is not one of the kinds I like, I cant be close to a guy, he’ll repulse me. Of course I’ll be polite, but I’d keep him at arms length and decline further invitations. If it is great, I can become quite aroused even if the guy is average looking or bit of a nerd.
I care little for looks as in how a guy looks in the picture. I did vote muscle tonality because to be attractive a man should feel like a man in my view. Visually, the way he walks, his posture and most importantly the way he moves his face are very important to me in how attracted I feel and also in how I want to treat someone. It also says a lot about who someone is deep down, the body never lies.
(I have very good self control and am a compassionate person, so even if a guy moves like he has a kick me note on his back, I will treat him with kindness. However, I only date men who respect themselves and thus naturally command respect and do not have to rely on the charity of others. I’m not going to partner off with someone who inspires mistreatment from others and puts them at unease.)
If a man has decent posture, looking comfortable in his skin, and his face moves in a way that is relaxed and friendly, it makes me feel at ease too. I don’t need to put him at ease because he is already there and we can just enjoy each others company.
The way he looks at me tells me if he is comfortable with his masculinity. You know the kind of glance where a guy is unapologetically indulging yet restrained by the requirements of strategy and propriety? That’s hot.
Okay, that was the first minute. So say he comes over for a chat, and I see him interact with his friend, and I see something more of his personality…I voted ability to lead men, but to be honest it is more important to me that he is his own man. He is not out mainly to impress his buddy or to score chicks, but to have a good time. He’ll put others at ease when needed and takes good care of those who are close to him. If his friend is the same way, then neither is the leader, but both are reliable and capable leaders.
I feel attracted when a guy uses touch, but in an appropriate way. Sometimes guys just lift me up and turn me around, which is pretty fun. Or to take your hand or his his hand on your back to guide or help you. All of this is attractive because it says he is comfortable with physicality. I also like if a guy is funny, but not in a clownish way, just to be witty about the things that come up in conversation. I’m pretty silly myself, so he could even be the straight man and show a dry wit to that.
I care little about height, jaw size or coloring by the way. Money and power should not be shown in the first 3 minutes IMHO. If a guy hints about his wealth or connections any earlier than a few dates in, it can make him look like is needs to use that to get a decent/pretty girl. He does not have to actively hide it, but you can see the intent/energy behind these things. Once you get to know a man’s character, the ambition, inteligence and social insight behind wealth and power are very attractive, but it actually matters little to what extent these have already materialised. A guy can have great ambition and skill at 22, but not actually be wealthy over the next 15 years, yet he will be as attractive as when he really is wealthy. (Unless the woman is seeking his company for his money.) The other qualities matter a little bit, they can lower attraction if bad, but alone are not enough to sustain attraction. I’d think of something like voice as a support quality. A really squeeky voice puts off, and a good voice is great on an otherwise attractive guy.
Looks are kinda important to me, he’s got to have a cute face. Smell is actually pretty huge for me, if I don’t like your scent, its a no go! There is a guy in one of my classes who is not quite my type, but I find him attractive because of his scent. Maybe he’s wearing pheromones? I’m not hard set on those things, I’ve dated not so tall guys with short hair. Of course, to me most guys are pretty tall, as I’m only 4’11 lol
