Dumped again !!

Field Reports & Anecdotal Experience Men's Pheromone Advice & Field Reports
1

Bad news - I have been dumped again!

I had been going out with a nice girl from near where I live. I met her in a nightclub and basically plucked up the courage to ask her out. She agreed! I was wearing instant shine and we were all in a happy mood! We had been going out for a number of weeks. I was over the moon because I thought she was out of my league.

Anyways, a couple of days back she texted me and said “I’ve found someone else, I really like him so don’t want to be with you anymore. I hope you find someone new”. This is the exact text she used. I was totally devastated, didn’t feel like going out and lost my appetite etc… I didn’t really want to feel this way, but I did. I really really liked her a lot and thought we got on well. My mate says its because I’m too nice a guy and of course, I don’t have male model looks or anything, I’m just a standard, ordinary guy.

OK, so I’m trying to get over her, but am having trouble. I keep thinking about her all the time! I haven’t had many girlfriends, and am not a player, so these things hurt me more than most. How do I get over it quickly?

To top it off, I am going to my friend’s party this weekend. She is going to be there along with her new boyfriend. I have in my stash Ammo, A314 and instant honesty. I want to give the following message to her - “you don’t know what you let go off!” - any ideas?

Thank you,
Charlie.

2

Go with an Ammo and A314 combo. There is a thread in my signature block about that combo.

MAke sure oyu are at the party. When you see them walk over and in a very friendly, cheery outgoing demeanor say “Hello X, how are you doing?”

She will say something like “Fine, thanks. And you?”

You say “Great!” give the two of them a quick little look, laugh a little as if you are quite amused, and walk away. Ignore them for the most part the rest of the evening unless they end up in a group you are talking with.

You have to be cheery, outgoing, and talk with people. Especailly people that are good looking females.

If she is having any second thoughts this will give her something to chew on as you are saying “Okay - if that is what you really want.” She will have to be the one to initiate a reconciliation is there is going to be one.

If she is set on her course then this will let her know she is not the center of the universe. You are not demeaning her in any way - just letting her know that you are not about to fall apart just because she does not want to date you anymore. You are a great guy and she will be missing out on all that with her choice. And youare strong enough to get on with your life if she wants to move on with hers without you.

Either way you should have a good time and not think twice about her.

3

I’ve got this new mantra i say when things don’t go my way.

“maybe this wont be bad”

saying it outloud with some conviction helps.

the general idea is that there is no way for you to know what is going to happen, but if you are in a good mood you are more likely to capitalize on an opportunity that does arise. who knows, maybe her breaking up with you may lead to you meeting another hot girl who you are even more suitable with. maybe you wont be hanging out with her and you’ll meet a guy who you will end up being best friends with in the future.

The reason players are “players” is because they have this consistent point of view. they don’t let girl issues get them down, and they keep on their merry way simply because they know other good things are coming.

Bosshank, I like everything you said except the one bit about giving them the look up and down and adding the “if this is what you want” smirk. I think its simply unnecessary.

Absolutely say hi to her, be cheerful, and show her what she did to you had zero effect on you. besides, you are a confident guy with other things going on right? Talk to everyone at the party. you don’t have to have huge in-depth conversations, but be sure to have a great time and be very social.

DO NOT DO NOT DO NOT only talk to the people you know or are comfortable with. you need to be a guy who everyone likes having around

This is your best chance of (1)having her reinitiate. It is also your best chance of (2)meeting other great girls, and (3) making new friends.

Now you tell me, even if the first one doesn’t turn out to be true,(and it might not) wouldn’t you rather have good odds for the second two?

NOW
this info i’ve just given is all well and good, but it doesn’t directly address the way you feel now. Your solution is this. distract yourself with things you like. imagine things the way you want them to be. excersize can be great for this, but everyone has their own ways of feelin’ good and i suggest you do as many of them as you can before the party.

Mix-wise I’m in full agreement with Bosshank, ammo and A314 combo.

4

You don’t need pheromones for this, dude basically just forget her. Ignore her at the party and act like it’s not even bothering you at all. If you cross her path sure say hi, but that’s it. Fuck her, why be sad over a girl who did this to you (and does it in that way?) That’s just a sign that she was not a good girl to begin with, and that she was not (or would not have been) capable of trusting. So don’t let her see you like you’re bothered, honestly don’t even try to send a signal like what you want to send at the party. Basically just forget it man, you’re better than that and you don’t need a girl like that.

I know you have not had many girls, but I think you probably fell head over heels for her very fast and made yourself think that she wouldn’t dump you/hurt you. Bad move, next time get to know the girl very well (even though some people are good at hiding their true personalities no matter what.) However, it’s the only way to really wonder (and hopefully see) what that person is really all about. I know this may sound like bad advice, but also never think a relationship will ever last. And also always trust, but have your shield in the “just in case” position just in case. So like that when/if it does happen, it won’t hurt as bad as you knew it could’ve happened (or could’ve not happen.) I know it sounds like not being optimistic, but shit happens.

If you still want to wear the pheromones I say also go with AMMO and A314.

5

I agree, and go ahead and be/try to be the life of the party. That’s just what I mean but acting like it’s not bothering you at all. Just have fun! Believe me, you’ll meet other girls, just go and have fun and don’t let this incident everyone in the world goes through get you down.

6

Go to the party, be the alpha male, polite, friendly and then walk away, talk to other people, enjoy yourself but ask yourself this, if she’s done this to you once, do you really want to risk it again? I’ve been there and it hurts, I know but everything happens for a reason, walk your path, not someone else’s

Mix wise, you’ve already been advised by two of the guys who helped me greatly when I started here. ammo and A314 all the way. be congruent and you will walk away from that party laughing your socks off.

7

Well…Im feeling similar things as you are… I understand that it is tough and that you cant help it feeling like crap…However, just follow the advice given and add some positive talk to yourself everyday when you look in the mirror. To be honest the only way to avoid this kind of stuff is to have a different approach towards women in general…Im not saying you should be an a-hole in the future but try to be a tease and give the cold shoulder a bit because falling like that is not good for either sides…but hei I just came out of a 6y relationship so what do I know!!! :stuck_out_tongue:

8

Charles . . . . Boss Hank has given absolutely perfect advice.
Take it - use it & move on.

9

I hope I dont get chased out of town here but.. do you have any friends who are girls? Believe me with your new mix..if she sees you talking intimately with someone else she will be crushing on you. Topping your light handed application of Ammo/A314 vibe with Instant Honesty or Instant Openness or Shine so you dont scare any gals off (or fight with other guys) at least until your body acclimates to your new signature, everyone around will be happy, and you’ll be WAY to confident to give a damn about her..

Btw.. I personally LOVE AMMO on the Bf.. but TOO much makes me brain-dead.. yes I go DIHL but its from feeling stoned and woozy.. so when you mix the other stuff, bear in mind your target does not have the same tolerance to your pheros as you do..

10

I’ve often thought that the company that could bring to market a pill to cure a broken heart would both make a fortune and do a great service to human happiness.

I’ve researched the problem and have some suggestions based on my own experiences. (Yes, even Whitehall gets dumped on rare occasions!) First, there are two conditions for the dumpee.

If it is a short-term thing, then rejection is a hit on our ego perception. We have been insulted and degraded IN OUR OWN MIND. Here, the solution is to get a grip on reality - there are THREE BILLION females on this planet. So you had one for a while but that’s only 0.33E-09 of the possibilities. The solution is to keep looking and nail a new one. Be thankful you had a chance at the lost one then find a new one girl. A honeybee doesn’t visit just one flower, now, does it? A good hard workout also helps.

If you’ve been together for a while, realize that when we get hot with another, our brains build reward circuits that release dopamine and other pleasure causing neurochemicals. One builds a mental model of the other person, her smells, her voice, etc.

Go “cold turkey,” and those pathways are starved for input and the general brain becomes very low on pleasure feedbacks. That’s the same general condition as depression. Depression is a personal version of Hell.

You don’t need anti-depressant prescriptions to ameliorate a broken heart. There are few supplements you can buy that will help.

  1. 5-HTP is a serotonin precursor - take it on an empty stomach before bedtime
  2. tryptophan, also a serotonin precursor - less potent but fewer gastic issues
  3. L-phenyl analine - a dopamine precursor - the DL version also works
  4. tyrosine - another dopamine precursor
  5. L-dopa - another dopamine precursor but may have more side effects

You can do both but do the dopamine precursors in the morning on an empty stomach and the serotoin precursors before bed on an empty stomach. The dopamine precursors are generally energizing while the serotoin precursors make us drowsy. Doing both at the same time blocks up the common blood-brain barrier pathway, as will eating other proteins/amino acids.

Note that one prophylactic approach is to NOT build those pleasure pathways in the first place with a lover. One can do that by not making love or seeing each other more than one a week. That gives us pleasure but allows us to reset the circuits so that they don’t get embedded and reinforced.

11

For some reason your post was as enlightning as it was scary! But to be honest…THANK YOU! :slight_smile:

12

Ive been in similar situations myself. If someone has done that once they will more than likely do it again if they feel they can get away with it. Ive had girls repeatedly hurt me. Just show you are happy within yourself and the people you are with and show that you can have a good time. Its not easy in this situation and its a horrible feeling, but if she has done it once whats stopping her doing it again? thats from my own personal experience.

13

ok so now the question is: wussy vs bad boy - How to be somewhere in between using this behaviour to avoid the boredom of a long term routine?

14

I wouldn’t wear the Honesty, it works on the wearer,too. The Ammo would give the sex vibe,maybe more than the new bf, the 314 to outclass him socially. Too bad you don’t Jerk or Dirty so she’ll know you’ve been with other women . Bring a real hottie with you.

15

Thanks for the advice ladies & gents, much appreciated as always…I will definitely wear the Ammo and A314, it sounds like a good combo. Unfortunately, I don’t have a “real hottie” to bring with me, in fact I’m not friends with any girl you could class as a “real hottie”, which is kind of sad I know, but that’s just me.

The wussy vs. bad-boy debate is quite interesting. Like I said I’m a stereotypical nice guy, not a wussy nor a bad-boy. It’s just not in my personality to be like that. I guess that’s why I always get dumped and am not the dumper! I’m not feeling sorry for myself, not at all. I’m happy and that’s all I give a shit about.

Let’s see what happens at the party. I’ll be sure to report and tell you all how it goes!

16

Thats what happen when you try to bite more than you can chew. Im sorry to be harsh but that is the truth. Everyone wants more but most often more isnt always better.

17

Good advice Whitehall, those are some good supplements and I’ve also (still do) use 5-HTP. I actually use a natural antidepressant blend at the moment from the company NOW called NOW Mood Support which includes 5-HTP and St John’s Wort with a blend of other important vitamins and whatnot, also along with some NOW L-Theanine for stress management (works pretty good.)

18

Charles, Your welcome and Good Luck… cant wait to hear how things go.

19

Jankren: I’ve read your post over and over again, and I’m trying to get at your true meaning here. by saying “more isn’t always better” do you mean:

you should look at what you have and find happiness somewhere in that.

or

Dreams are unattainable, don’t even bother.

20

I’m sorry Jankren, but I completely disagree with that. Ok I got dumped for a “better model”, but at least I had the chance of being with a hot girl (way waaay out of my league) for a short time. For a guy like me, that experience is gold.

If I go with your advice, I would perpetually be aiming for below average looking women.