I can’t speak for anyone else, but you hit the jack-pot as far as I am concerned.
While clubbing is fun, having someone you can really connect with is even better.
I’m so glad to hear you’re happy Mark. It’s been a long time coming. 
Don’t leave us little people, though!
Does S know about your phero use? You should bring her on board, as well.
Sweet cowboy, I’m so happy you and S found each other. I wish you all the love and happiness you can handle. 
I haven’t been posting much myself as I haven’t had as many opportunities to test as I’d like, and frankly, I don’t feel as though I have much to contribute lately.
Anyways, I do hope you’ll be around from time to time to let us know how things are going with you. I suspect as long as AD keeps making MX292 all will go well. You are buying it by the 10 gallon drum, right? 
Hugs and Kisses,
Bella
XOXOXOX
Bella! Izzat you??! 
In your avatar I mean.
I’ll still be around, this place is just to hard to stay away from.
I haven’t been doing a lot of posting either, although I do try to get in a report a week or so. And, yeah Bella I did pickup another 3 bottles of MX292 the other day, but I like wearing the MX272 around “S” better, cause it always lifts her mood when she’s had a bad day. And by the way, it’s good to see ya!
And as for you Aridane, thanks! She doesn’t really know about my phero use, although I did try to give her EST to wear to work, cause they don’t treat herr very well and I thought it could help. I tried to explain it as a hormone byproduct that pregnant women produce to encourage nurturing, and she’s like " You mean PHEROMONES! no thanks". So no, I don’t think she’s gonna be joining us.
And hey folks, watch for some interesting blind reporting coming in a thread from CookieGirl, Happykitune and Sillykitty. Should be pretty fiun and interesting to follow.
Hey Mark - Gegogi has commented a few times about his Korean girlfriends having a temper (with him being of Korean ethnicity himself). Might want to keep LOTS of MX 272 handy … lol.
Well pretty much another entire weekend spent with “S” and not all that much to report, but I did get out bfor a couple of hours Saturday night, cause “S” wanted to stay in and I didn’t, and I did test a bit with low levels of P75.
So, Friday we ended up staying in and getting hammered! I took her to work that day and picked her up, cause the weather sucked, and well I knew that I’d be bringing her back to my place anyway.
I wore a diluted mix of 1 spray of about 1.8 - 2.0 mcg’s of P75, and of course the usual 3 sprays of MX272 when I went to pick her up. She had another bad day at work and we ended up going out for a couple of margarita’s when I picked her up, but quickly the MX272 worked it’s magic and lifted her out of the bad mood.
I re-applied another 3 sprays of MX272 and another shot of my diluted P75 mix around 9:00 PM or so, and I’ve gotta say that it did make “S” somewhat more touchy-feely than is normal for her.
We ended up staying up drinking till 8:00 AM Saturday morning before going to bed, and when I woke up at close to 3:00 PM Saturday Morning (OK, well afternoon), I saw that I’d missed a call from Jasmin. Damn it!
“S” woke up around 4:00 or so and felt about as rough as I had when I first woke up. She was hungry though and we decided to go to Olive Garden and grab something to eat. The service kind of sucked and the food just didn’t quite do it for either of us, probably cause both of our stomaches were still reeeling from the night before.
Anyway, we were supposed to go to a different club that night, but she just wasn’t up for it. Around 9:00 she told me that if I had an itch to go out she’d be OK with it, and I took that as my opportunity to hit Cape Buffalo, at least for a little while.
I left around 10:00 wearing 3 sprays of MX292 and another shot of my dilluted P75 mix. When I got there is was jam packed and I really wasn’t having a great time, probably at least partially cause I don’t feel the need to be out prowling, and it’s just not the same when she’s not around!
Anyway, I did notice that I was getting a LOT of looks from a girl across the bar, and I finally decided what the hell I’m gonna go over and talk to her, but by the time I was able to maneuver through the crowd and get near her, someone else was hitting on her.
I saw a guy that I knew and went overr to say hi to him, and he was with a girl and introduced us. They were clearly together, but while I was there all her attention was focused on me.
“S” text messaged me around 11:00 and asked if I could bring some fruit home when I left. Of course the closest 2 supermarkets close at midnight, which she knows, but I wasn’t having all that much fun anyway and was more than content to leave early and get back to her.
I left at 11:40, hit the supermarket on the way home and picked up some fruit, then headed back to my happy home.
We stayed up late (early) again, and just as the night before I saw another side to “S”. She asked me something to the effect of what my worst sexual experience was, and we shared a couple of stories. That is not the kind of conversation she would normally engage in, nonetheless start!
Another thing I noticed this weekend is that she mentioned ex-boyfriends a lot. I’m thinking that may have been somewhat of a jealousy type thing, or just to let me know that she has options?
Observations:
Well, I saw a thread, I think by Warren, and re-affirmed by PheroQuirk? that P75 works in very low doses, but not well at high levels, and that’s why I went back to it and tried it again, but heavily dilluted from the 37.5 mcg per spray to-go bottle I had.
It definitely seemed to bring out another layer in “S” that I’d not really seen before. She was more touchy-feely, cuddly and sexually open than I’d ever seen.
At the club, I really didn’t notice much of any kind of difference or additional efects, but I wasn’t at my peak, wasn’t all that thrilled to be there, and was more than happy to go home to the only girl I really want to be with anyway, so it probably isn’t really fair for me to make an assessment from the club anyway.
For anyone who’s been following my journal and may not get over to the womens journals often, you should jump over and take a look at the “Three Blind Mice” (Three Blind Mice!) thread. CookieGirl, Happykitsune and Sillykitty have a rather interesting experiment going, and it should be really fun to follow.
No need to apologize Mark, just enjoy yourself and if you do have something to report, please do. If you don’t, it’s not a big deal, your contributions to the forum have been lasting and numerous, you deserve a break.
check it out on your recommendation, turned out to be an interesting discussion
Nothing new to report, but thought I’d stop in and post a more recent pic of “S”. The one from a couple of pages ago was from 9 years ago and she really does look better now.
Hey man, she’s very attractive! Nice!
You chose a stunning background for the portrait, mark lol
Woo, I wish I had her long hair 
Did I miss the reason why she was in the olympics ? I sure wanna know !
Well, I’m single again and now living in a new apartment with a girl for a roomate.
“S” and I moved into the new apartment on Monday and Tuesday, then Friday night we stayed in watched movies and got a bit drunk. She ended up telling me that “her one true love” ruined her for all other men, and as you can probably guess, that got under my skin.
Hearing that was like turning off a light switch to me and caused me to completely lose interest in being with her, because I am just not willing to settle for being number 2, EVER!
She told me that she really likes me and wants to be with me, but that she will never love anybody the way she loved him. So, I told her that I wanted to be with her too, but that I wasn’t willing to compete with anyone, including someone from her past that she hasn’t gotten over, and that I couldn’t be with her knowing that I wasn’t the one who she really wanted to be with.
We do get along great though, and while I’ve never remained friends with an ex, she is still friends with several of hers, so we’re going to make a go of it as just being friends and roomates.
I have a second bedroom and planned to use it to office out of the apartment, as I have in my last couple of apartments, but I ended up moving my furniture and now it’s my office/bedroom.
I only wish she’d told me a month ago, before we decided to move in together, because I haven’t had a roommate in 20 something years, and would not have one now had she said something sooner.
So goes it! I guess I get to go back to testing and reporting more regularly now.
bummer man. bummer.
Damn. Sorry to hear that Mark. Really sucky.
Maybe once you go out and do some testing she will come around.
I do like your business website though. Very nice.
Thanks Boss, but there is no coming around. She has told me that she was sorry for telling me and that she didn’t mean that she could never love again, just not the way she loved him.
But, that changes nothing. She’s placed a past love on a pedestal and believes that nobody can compete with him. He doesn’t even live in the country and she’ll ever even see him again, so it’s not likely that he’d come around and do anything to kill the god like status she’s given him.
She told me that they never argued or disagreed about anything and that when they were together he made her feel like she was a princess and the only girl in the world. Oh yeah, and she also told me that he was married but it was an arranged marriage and he didn’t love his wife, but because of his culture he couldn’t leave her.
Go figure, a married guy getting some on the side who never argued with his mistress!
Unless and until she realizes that going into a relationship with the expectation that it’s not going to measure up to one from the past, and that this one true love that nobody can hold a torch to was kinda one-sided and she was probably just being used (ya think?), then she’ll never be happy in any relationship nor be able to make anybody else truly happy either.
I don’t see that happening anytime soon, and even if she were to tell me that she was completely over the guy, I’d never give it another chance because I know that there would always be a doubt in my mind whether or not I was the one she really wanted to be with.
And I gotta say that telling me about having an affair with someone who was married knocked her down a couple of notches in my mind too.
And, thanks for the compliment on my website. I built that one myself, but have been thinking about having my designer give it a makeover, as I’m just not very creative.
I did get out the other week (to a strip club), well actually 2 times, and met a dancer who’s mixed (Filipino and black). We’re having a house warming party next week and she wants to come. Could prove interesting!
Mark,
Just like to say 2 things;
- She is not over the other guy yet.
Or I’d rather say, didn’t (mature) out of it yet. She needs time, and needs to make a choice to get over it. She didn’t achieve either.
I’ve seen few women say the same, with many, or most, get over it, by finding a new love, and only then, they themselves shoot their own blindness and the old lover down and out of their minds, and realise what it really was - Obvious in her case, isen’t it.
- The above is her problem, not yours.
You are doing the right thing - look elsewhere.
Many women around have done their (homework) already, and are ready to meet you on your path.
You’d be surprised, and much relieved, when you find such a woman and start to build a bond with her.
If you know what you want, go look for it, and don’t look back.
Cowboy, that was a real kick in the teeth. I’m so sorry to hear that. Very bad form on her part and terribly unfair. I know you’d never have considered making any move under those circumstances. I have no doubt you thought there was real potential or you wouldn’t have moved in with her.
I also know she probably didn’t mean to hurt you by saying that. She was drunk… and I’ll venture to say it’s something she lives with (this unreal fantasy). Her defenses were down and in a moment of weakness, it popped out. It resides just below the surface. Fact is, it’s always there…this unfulfilled longing. She doesn’t know it and maybe never will… no one can fulfill that but her and she must allow herself to do it. I agree, she idealized the relationship and never got a handle on what it was all about. She has emotionally stifled herself in loyalty to a love(r) that never really existed to begin with. He used her and she can’t/won’t realize it.
It’s her cross to bear, not yours. (Though she’s done a good job of trying to make it yours.) IDK what kind of reaction she expected from a confession like that. How could it be good? She realized what she’d said and, of course, later regretted it. WTH would she say if you told her that? “Oh, that’s great Mark. I really don’t mind playing second fiddle?” I don’t think she’d like it much. Though who knows, she is used to playing second fiddle. So, maybe in her own mind she figured you’d be OK with it too. 
What bothers me/tics me off, is she knew she felt this way all along but led you to believe something else. She had to, otherwise you wouldn’t be in this mess, Ollie.
And now…you’ve got a roommate?!! Crap. I’ma ring-a-ding you.
One thing I admire and love about you, cowboy…is despite having had more than your share of heartache in the passed…you’re always willing to open your heart, again, and saddle up. That takes some kinda man.
Hugs and Kisses,
Bella
Thanks Mak and Bella! I know that she’s not over him, otherwise she never would have let that statement slip out.
I will disagree about needing to make a choice to get over it though. That “relationship” was a lot of years ago and is still firmly ingrained in her mind, making a decision to let it go may sound OK, but does nothing to change deeply rooted emotions. I believe that she has tried to let go and move on, but her heart won’t let her. Otherwise why bother with any releationship at all?
I know she didn’t mean to hurt me, but better now than later right? I know that between her one true love and me she had been in a couple of abusive relationships, and that may have something to do with her idolizing a relationship that was probably nothing more than a married guy getting himself a peice of ass on the side. But, the why or reasoning behind it makes no difference, I still would have been the guy she was settling for and had the guy ever walked back into her life, I’ve no doubt I’d have been kicked to the curb.
The friendship is actually on shaky grounds now too. It’s been over 2 weeks since we ended the relationship and she’s stayed cooped up in her room with the door closed almost ever since. She sleeps till 2:00 or 3:00 PM every day, and has done nothing whatsoever to help out around the apartment. I didn’t mind doing things like taking the trash out and cleaning up in the kitchen when we were a couple and back when we weren’t living together, but damnit, I ain’t the boyfriend anymore and she’s not a guest.
If things don’t change and change soon, I don’t see this lasting for very long!