I haver never used pheromones, and want to try it. I really like this girl, but she gives me mixed signals
and i want to try and see what i can do to win her over convincingly. So any help and advice on how to score with her, and i mean have her for the rest of my life, would be appreciatted as well.
there is so much confusing information about pheromones, and clarity would be good. Since you guys use it , i think users are the best judges rather then promoters right. How and when should i use them?
I have known her for around 2 years, but really been interested in her for around 10 months, she is 25 i am 32. We usually meet outside of work hours 2-3 times a week and talk alot and we speak alot on the phone, sms, but its the dating part we are having trouble on. We cant seem to get that of the ground She has asked me three times but we managed to go out once, i have asked her three times but managed none of them. Sometimes she would touch my hair, my arms, she would smile and look at me and i can definitely see it in her eyes that she likes me. Sometimes it is in her words. But other times i get the feeling that i am not important and she is trying to ‘play diffficult to get’. As for race, we live in london, she is Lithuanian and i am British of Bangladeshi descent. Race is not an issue.
When i said i would like to score with her, i really meant was i consider her as someone i would like to marry in the long term.
So i hope this info is helpful. Not just using pheromns but also how to keep her and take it to the next level. if you have any more detailed advice it would be helpful. Thanks.
OK. Since your intentions are for a relationship and not just fast sex, I would recommend Instant Openness and Instant Honesty for some RAPPORT building with her. On top of that, a sexy pheromone, and sorry, I have no clue about what those are for the men. The men’s forum can better help you with that. Or our very own Lor or a few of the other ladies (Dolly!) may chirp in here and be of some help.
GOOD LUCK!
And when YOU ask her out, ask for a SPECIFIC DATE - 7:30 Friday or Saturday night. Sweep her off her feet! Bring flowers (roses are excellent) so she is CLEAR, “THIS is a date!”
April is right you have to make a date and stick to it. Dont beat around the bush and say “hey lets get together and go out sometime” Pick a date and time and just do it. Make her aware that its a date. She has asked you and you have asked her so you know the attraction and interest is there.
Now for pheromones
Instant Openness and Instant Honesty are great choices but you need something to create a little sex appeal without overwhelming so I would get Ammo as well. Also you may want to buy some A314 and use just a tiny bit to give off that Alpha respect vibe. Instant Shine would be a very good product as well.
So for your weekly pre-date get togethers that you have been having a few times a week you could wear.
IO
A314
Shine
For a happy open respectful vibe
And for the actual dates you could wear
Ammo
IH
Shine
For a happy deep sexy vibe.
If you cant get all those at once start slow and get the Ammo and the IO or Shine.
The problem is not me. Out of seven dates we have gone out twice, she was the first to ask me, she asked me the second time and the third, every other time after this i asked her, appointments were cancelled by her not me, on five consecutive times. So i am confused i have asked why she has cancelled, but she keeps saying something has come up or other. So its confusing, as she approached me first.
But we still talk a lot o the phone and when we meet after work. and she gets really upset when i ignore her, when she cancelled the last date i was so annoyed i didnt talk to her for 10 days, when we finally did, she called me first and said she was to scared to call me. i dont know if she is playing mind games, and i dont want to come on to heavy that she really gets scared away. So i dont know maybe i need ‘HITCH’ to sort this out.
i wonder if i provide more information maybe ladies it can be more helpful. She asked me out first, we didnt go, she cancelled, she asked me out 2nd time we went out, she asked me out the third time, at very short notice, like 10 miuntes, i said you go, if you feel like meeting some one, she got angry and said if i want to meet someone, i wouldnt ask you, i want to go with you, so i agreed , five minutes later she cancelled.
i asked her out, she said yes, then cancelled, and the same again and the same again. so every occasion she cancelled, not me. The last time she cancelled she i didnt talk to her for 10/11 days because i was so angry. She called me, and apologised said she was to scared to call because i was angry. She really hates it when i ignore her, and this is not the first time i have ignored her, so i know, the previous time i ignored she was on the verge of crying, and she told me she couldnt sleep and she was going out of her mind.
Ladies i understand now the concept of using the phmones. But i want to understand the psychology of the woman, she gets so excited when i buy her presents, but she didnt even bother to ask me how i was after a hospital operation on my hand. She flirts sometimes and other times she is withdrawn and melancholic. She waits for me after work and talk alot but dating i s so hard, i fid it hard to get answers on her feelings in direct questions, but sometimes she gives me bits in her general talk.
If there is a ‘HITCH’ in the world i need that person right now.
I agree with the other two as to what pheromones to use. However, I would strongly advise not to rush into the whole marriage planning. I wanted to marry my ex boyfriend and I was completely devastated when he broke up with me. Just take your time, relax, and enjoy your relationship.
However, dinner and movies is too cliche for a first date. It has been used over and over again, and it gets boring. Try to do something fun and different for a first date. That will increase your chances of her coming back to you later . For instance, if you’re both into pottery, go to a crafts store and take a lesson. If you’re both into rock climbing, go do that together. Anything that is fun and different. Think about what kind of things both of you like to do and set a date to go do that.
Thank you for your input so, i thought i would clarify some points.
Fisrt the marriage part; what i meant was she is some one i want to spend the rest of my life with, in fact this is the first time i have felt this way about a woman, in my 32 years of life.
Second, she is the one who has cancelled dates, i have not cancelled a single one. in fact she is the first one to ask me out. I ignored her on 2 occasions when she failed to provide any explanation of why she cancelled, and she hated it so much, first time i ignored she was about to cry and told me later she was going out of her head worrying. Second time, she was scared to call me and we didnt talk for 10 days, eventually she called me. i understand sometimes things come up. but five times in a row, and without an explanation and minutes before we are supposed to meet. Any way i havent seen her for a month either, but we are still speaking on the phone a lot.
Ladies i understand the pheromone part, but i need advice on the more social and interaction part. how to keep control and not screw up. So some help there from you ladies would be appreciated.
I am not sure she is playing you but she is taking advantage. She could just be immature and unsure of what she wants.
This is what I would do and it may not work out the way you want but at least you will know if she is interested in being more than friends. You said you already tried to talk about it and she wont give you a straight anwser. Talking about it is always the first option in my opinion.
Second option…
Do not buy her presents, not even coffee!! Buy her nothing unless on a real date. This go’s for the first option as well if you work it out that way.
After work when you meet or were ever you see each other dont seek her attention. If she approaches you fine, talk, be nice but dont show your totally into her. Dont tell her you will call her later.
Let her call you !
When she does and I have a good feeling she will, cut it short and say your going out and will talk to her later. Do it a few times and she will start to think who the hell are your going out with. If she asks just say your going to a club or bar or something. Dont ask her to go or meet you there. If she asks which one say I am not sure which one WE are going to. Throw a couple of “we’s” in the conversation like " we are going to a club" These are just examples but you get my point. Make her feel like you still like her but you could lose interest or someone else can snag you up if she dosnt move her butt.
By now, if she is into you she will be questioning whats going on and then you can tell her that you didnt think she was interested in being more than friends because she kept canceling and you didnt want to pressure her. Tell her you want to date but you want someone who respects and cares enough about you to show up. I agree with you that 5 times without a good explanation is more then weird its rude.
She can go two ways. You may find out she isnt interested in being anything but friends or she may work harder to make the relationship work. Either way you will know the truth.
You deserve someone who respects and cares about your feelings and cares enough to at the very least call you when your at the hospital. I do that for people who are just my friends
Tisha’s advice is absolutely right on. But I would add that as your description of her behavior emerges (particularly in post #5 above) it seems like she is not a very stable person, at least not right now. I’d be very wary if I were you of getting in deeper with her at this point in her life.
By getting in deeper I mean becoming more romantically involved with her than you already are. She sounds full of conflict and drama, by your description.
Wow. This lady sure has some issues, huh? I agree with Tisha. That would be a way to “smoke out” her feelings and intentions.
I think that after she starts chasing you, which she likely will, you should load up on Instant Honesty before you see her the next time. That way, you will be even more likely to find out if she is being serious in pursuing you, or if she is just playing another game.
I also agree with Tisha on the point that you deserve someone who respects and cares for you more than that. She is playing a serious game with your head. That’s not good.
i understand your sceptism. why would i want a woman who does that. there is a lot more to her then what i have said so far, the fact she waits for me, the fact she calls me often and we talk for ages on the phone. The fact also she took the first step and asked me out first. the fact we have know each other for more then two years, and to get to this stage really means either i or her needs some help. I am making the assumption it is me who needs the help.
I’m not going to try to tell you what to do, because you have got to do what you feel in your heart is right, but I am going to give advise: Be EXTREMELY careful if you follow trisha’s advise and you end up in a relationship with her. If she is jerking you around like she is now, she WILL continue to do it in a relationship with you IF YOU LET HER. (I’m not angry, I’m just stressing the important words ) I know this for a fact, because I used to be like that. I wanted to be in a relationship with a guy in my high school so bad, and I kept jerking him around. One week, I would be nice and friendly with him, and another week I was mad at him for some stupid reason. He ended up getting fed up with me, and he still won’t talk to me to this day. I was very messed up in high school. Once I got my head on straight in college, I was not like that anymore, and then I started having relationships. I had to grow up and work out my own problems before I could get into a meaningful relationship. I think she might be the same way, and I think she needs to work out her own problems in order to get into a meaningful relationship with you. I was fortunate enough not to need a psychologist to work out my own problems, and I hope she is the same way. I’m not saying that she is messed up and needs a psychologist, I’m saying she is probably going through difficult times and needs to get her thoughts together and figure out what she needs to do before she gets into a relationship.
. For instance, if you’re both into pottery, go to a crafts store and take a lesson. If you’re both into rock climbing, go do that together. Anything that is fun and different. Think about what kind of things both of you like to do and set a date to go do that.